What’s going on with our young ladies

[Dr H..]

Question:

What’s going on with our young ladies? I have noticed at several churches that a large number of the young females are going away to college and returning home pregnant. It’s like an epidemic in the church and the sad part is most of them are attending Church affiliated schools.

 

[Braveman12]

I don't know what it is, but it seems that all the teachings that our young people receive isn't "sticking" as it once did. :smh:

 

[CriTAUcal]

Question:

What’s going on with our young ladies? I have noticed at several churches that a large number of the young females are going away to college and returning home pregnant. It’s like an epidemic in the church and the sad part is most of them are attending Church affiliated schools.

This ain't nothing new.
And probably the main ones who are attending the church-affiliated schools may be the main ones whose parents kept a tight hold on them as teenagers. Once you get a taste of freedom for the first time at 18, you lose your mind.

 

[jsupop33]

I pray my little sister doesnt get pregnant...

 

[CriTAUcal]

I pray my little sister doesnt get pregnant...

Encourage her to abstain.
If she can't abstain, she needs to be using condoms AND low-dosage hormonal birth controls.

 

[Dr H..]

Crit

I have to agree with you. One of the young ladies I attempted to recruit to go to TN State, her Mom said “I don’t want her going out there with those unbelievers†you know my blood pressure went up almost to stroke level. She went to one of our Church affiliated schools in Terrell, TX and as the Old Folks say at home “somebody hit her in the head with a hammerâ€

When I saw her Mom a few weeks ago I asked her did her daughter go to school with some unbelievers. She gave me a look that could raise the dead. And there have been several that have been abused by their boyfriends.

A young lady I use to date, daughter called her Mon all kinds of names, after graduating from high school. She moved out to live with her father and grandmother, within three months she was pregnant, they put her out and called her a few names. She ended up back at home with her Mom. And the sad part is she never told her Mom that she was sorry for call her names. After the baby was a few months old, she called her Mom the same thing again and moved out.

I am thinking if I had married your Mom, there is no way in hell would you be allowed to live in my house.


-------

This is somewhat funny but sad – one Wednesday Night at Bible Study, we were studying about the Man that had his Fathers wife (1 Corinthians 5) and “this is stupid, absolutely stupid) one of the men said “Bro H, is it wrong for a husband and wife to look at pornography†the entire adult class looked at him and like in a tennis match, everyone turn their head and looked at his wife. Bro. H, blushed and attempted to answer the question, by telling him any type of pornography is wrong. Your wife should take care of your needs and you hers. But I think you and your wife need to stop by the office after Bible Study.
I and perhaps everyone else is thinking “why in the world would you ask this in Bible Study†I don’t know what happened in Preachers office, but homeboy did not attend church for three weeks.

 

[CriTAUcal]

Crit

I have to agree with you. One of the young ladies I attempted to recruit to go to TN State, her Mom said “I don’t want her going out there with those unbelievers” you know my blood pressure went up almost to stroke level. She went to one of our Church affiliated schools in Terrell, TX and as the Old Folks say at home “somebody hit her in the head with a hammer”

When I saw her Mom a few weeks ago I asked her did her daughter go to school with some unbelievers. She gave me a look that could raise the dead. And there have been several that have been abused by their boyfriends.

A young lady I use to date, daughter called her Mon all kinds of names, after graduating from high school. She moved out to live with her father and grandmother, within three months she was pregnant, they put her out and called her a few names. She ended up back at home with her Mom. And the sad part is she never told her Mom that she was sorry for call her names. After the baby was a few months old, she called her Mom the same thing again and moved out.

I am thinking if I had married your Mom, there is no way in hell would you be allowed to live in my house.


-------

This is somewhat funny but sad – one Wednesday Night at Bible Study, we were studying about the Man that had his Fathers wife (1 Corinthians 5) and “this is stupid, absolutely stupid) one of the men said “Bro H, is it wrong for a husband and wife to look at pornography” the entire adult class looked at him and like in a tennis match, everyone turn their head and looked at his wife. Bro. H, blushed and attempted to answer the question, by telling him any type of pornography is wrong. Your wife should take care of your needs and you hers. But I think you and your wife need to stop by the office after Bible Study.
I and perhaps everyone else is thinking “why in the world would you ask this in Bible Study” I don’t know what happened in Preachers office, but homeboy did not attend church for three weeks.

:smh: and :lol: at the same time. Really laughing at your Bible study story though. :lol: And really, really shaking my head at your other stories. We can't keep our children wrapped so tight that we don't let them experience life a little bit as teens. We've got to prepare them for real life and what they're going to be faced with as soon as they leave high school. Otherwise, they will lose their minds and get in trouble.

My parents kept a watchful eye on me as a child and teen, but they loosened the strings enough for me to be able to experience "life" a little as a young adult. So that when I went off the JSU, freedom wasn't so brand new to me. That's how you got to raise your children, especially the daughters.

 

[jsupop33]

Encourage her to abstain.
If she can't abstain, she needs to be using condoms AND low-dosage hormonal birth controls.

I know.. I just don't feel comfortable telling her that stuff. I hope my mom did a good job

 

[illinijag]

I don't know what it is, but it seems that all the teachings that our young people receive isn't "sticking" as it once did. :smh:

Many local Churches spend more time teasing the flock with emotional drama to receive applauses in respond (can I get an Amen). This only feeds the flesh (human emotion); the same can be achieved by a melodic tune with a rhythmic beat. Many people leave a whooping Church thinking some special anointed person spoke to them and swear they were praising/worshiping in the spirit; this too is a false assumption. This hijacking of emotions leaves people with more riddles to ponder than the truth that will last. Most important, it leaves no conviction against one’s current life of sin. Whipping people into a frenzy with little message content is using worldly/carnal means, such has no lasting value. God only ask us to teach and preach His word as His Son did to His followers (no theatrics or added props required).

2 Corinthians 10:3-4. For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh: For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds

When people are not taught God's Truth for the purpose of getting to know Jesus or to pattern their lives after Jesus, there really is no teaching.

In summary, the problem is not the babies produced by young ladies or young men. Kids and even grown folks will do, as they are lead to do; the problem is sin. This reckless attitude requires a heart change, which results in a life that reflects a life that follows Christ.

Let us not be deceived by kids or Grown folks going to Church, I played the game better than most, such mean nothing if they have not truly accepted Christ and live life in a way that reflects a heart change. Dipping in a pool of water and going before the Church and saying that you accept Jesus, is not always synonymous with salvation.

No matter what our opinions are in this matter. We must conclude that there is a PROBLEM when the lives of those who claim to be a part of the Body of Christ (Christians) are no different than those who do not claim Christ as there savior.

Matthew 7:20. Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.

:lectureo our life reflect the fruits of Salvation? If not, just as many young ladies, we too may need a heart change…we too may need to find Jesus.

Good Day and God Bless

 

[dacontinent]

Encourage her to abstain.
If she can't abstain, she needs to be using condoms AND low-dosage hormonal birth controls.

Why? No. I am not kidding.

My point is that I believe that we are seeing more incidents now because we are not talking to the young people about these things.

I will never encourage a young person to use birth control. Call me old school and antiquated but I ain't gonna tell them that. If they are bold enough to take the steps into promiscuity after I have taught them differently, then they had better be responsible enough to take care of any pregnancies that result. And, yes, that is part of what I teach them.

If they are going to be promiscuous, then I do suggest that they use a condom. Why? Because I want them to have a chance to be alive so I can lead them to Christ even after they have been involved in sexual sin...just as I would if they were liars.

 

[Tigerpride]

Well, this is not new. Our grandparents were having kids when they were 13. Those girls going off to college are GROWN. Is there a rule somewhere now that says you have to be out of college to have a child?

 

[illinijag]

Well, this is not new. Our grandparents were having kids when they were 13. Those girls going off to college are GROWN. Is there a rule somewhere now that says you have to be out of college to have a child?

Excellent point, there is no new thing under the sun (Ecclesiastes 1:9). However, if we are Christian (i.e. actual members of the Body of Christ) we must discern what rule we are to follow.

Acts 15:29. That ye abstain from meats offered to idols, and from blood, and from things strangled, and from fornication: from which if ye keep yourselves, ye shall do well. Fare ye well.

1 Corinthians 6:18. Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.

As Christians, our rule is given by God and the rule book is the Bible.

note: fornication also apply to us grown folks who shack-up and play Church folks on Sunday.

Good Day and God Bless

 

[Apaquelypse]

If I can be honest, Church for most folk under 30 is a joke. It is filled with gimmicks and schemes on how to get "stuff" from God. When young folks leave there home church to go off to school, the are unprepared to live godly lifestyles because the church itself is afraid to live godly.

All the comprimising of the word, all of the passivity of the word, all the slanted teachings of the word - on top of an already busy devil, just leaves our youth, our next generation, out there to get tossed around by any and every temptation that raises it head and says "try me."

 

[jsupop33]

Why? No. I am not kidding.

My point is that I believe that we are seeing more incidents now because we are not talking to the young people about these things.

I will never encourage a young person to use birth control. Call me old school and antiquated but I ain't gonna tell them that. If they are bold enough to take the steps into promiscuity after I have taught them differently, then they had better be responsible enough to take care of any pregnancies that result. And, yes, that is part of what I teach them.

If they are going to be promiscuous, then I do suggest that they use a condom. Why? Because I want them to have a chance to be alive so I can lead them to Christ even after they have been involved in sexual sin...just as I would if they were liars.

I prefer to have them on birth control. It is bad enough to mess up your own life but to ruin your own life but to bring a child into an unstable household..

 

[JayRob]

Instead of preaching about contraceptives and logical pregnancy prevention, most churches teach about abstinence, which is not logical these days, to say the least.

Young people also realize there's such a thing as hypocrisy in many churches. Grown folks telling them what to do, but the grown folks themselves aren't following their own advice.

 

[CriTAUcal]

Why? No. I am not kidding.

To prevent un-wanted pregnancies. We have enough poor parents out here who have no interest in raising their kids.

I don't like birth controls either, but I'd rather see a girl take them to prevent unwanted pregnancies.

 

[CEE DOG]

Well, this is not new. Our grandparents were having kids when they were 13. Those girls going off to college are GROWN. Is there a rule somewhere now that says you have to be out of college to have a child?

Thanks for telling the truth TP. Truth is our Grandparents were no older than the ones in 2009. We just tend to hide family secrets, while in today's society folks just put it out there. Our grandparents and parents just got married to cover it up. In fact half of us might not even be granddaddies or daddies baby. Jody was sneaking in the back door then, now he just comes in the front door.

 

[Tigerpride]

Thanks for telling the truth TP. Truth is our Grandparents were no older than the ones in 2009. We just tend to hide family secrets, while in today's society folks just put it out there. Our grandparents and parents just got married to cover it up. In fact half of us might not even be granddaddies or daddies baby. Jody was sneaking in the back door then, now he just comes in the front door.

Mane, I do family history and I can't believe what some of those sweet old church ladies did. I won't even write down who some of the real daddies of their kids are because I ain't about to be the one to tell people that their granny had a Jody. But heck, the way men treated women back then, (gone for weeks at a time, gamblin away the money, stayin w other women, abusing them and daring them to say anything....) they needed a Jody sometime just to feed their kids.

But again, those ladies are grown. Some of us argue about being put here to be fruitful yet soon society is gonna say that you need to be 30 and have a PHD before you can get married. These young ladies bodies are able to conceive children at 12 or 13....(like they used to...and like ALL of us here today got here)....who says that is not what God wanted?

Now, having said that, I do think that the world if different now and children can't be having children...and 12 or 13 is certainly too young. I have a 17 year old neice who I would not want to get pregnant but if she did....oh well. She wouldn't be the first or the last. (Hopefully Crit's book can help her... )

 

[Tony]

yeah but unless you're married, then conceive, it's still wrong
no matter you did or does it.

 

[JayRob]

yeah but unless you're married, then conceive, it's still wrong
no matter you did or does it.

That's a matter of opinion. Whatever works for that couple, just as long as they take care of their children. Being married doesn't guarantee anything.

 

[dacontinent]

...Those girls going off to college are GROWN. Is there a rule somewhere now that says you have to be out of college to have a child?

GROWN??!! If they have their own jobs and foot their own bills, then I agree. Otherwise...

I wish there was a rule that said you have to be out of college to have a child. Again, it is a WISH.

 

[dacontinent]

Instead of preaching about contraceptives and logical pregnancy prevention, most churches teach about abstinence, which is not logical these days, to say the least.

Young people also realize there's such a thing as hypocrisy in many churches. Grown folks telling them what to do, but the grown folks themselves aren't following their own advice.

Churches teaching abstinence are following the scriptures. It is the standard. To teach otherwise is hypocrisy.

 

[dacontinent]

Well, this is not new. Our grandparents were having kids when they were 13. Those girls going off to college are GROWN. Is there a rule somewhere now that says you have to be out of college to have a child?

While my grandmother may have been giving birth at 13, she did so after getting married at 12. That was more than 100 years ago.

 

[Dr H..]

dac
I reckon I am Old School also; I don’t like birth control pills and those other chemicals that pollute the body. Whenever I hear preachers encouraging parents to take their daughters to the Dr’s for Birth Control Pills, that tells me that the preacher is saying its ok for them to have sex and it’s like giving them a license to have sex
My great-grand mother was 15 and he husband was in his 40’s when they were married. The difference between then and now is he had finished at Alcorn and purchased 150 acres of land. Kids (very few) these days knows how to write a check or balance a check book.

Those girls going off to college are GROWN

Grown my [excuse my Greek] just out of high school, no money, job, car etc, etc. I will bet 99.99% of them are irresponsible and totally lost as to how to take care of a baby. That’s why a majority end up at home with their parents. “TP†you can’t compare children today with your grandparents, I know I can’t.


Apq

“Church for most folk under 30 is a joke†I did not see you at Church Service yesterday that’s exactly what the preacher said.

 

[CriTAUcal]

GROWN??!! If they have their own jobs and foot their own bills, then I agree. Otherwise...

I wish there was a rule that said you have to be out of college to have a child. Again, it is a WISH.

If you're 18 and in college, you are GROWN. The law would treat you as such.
You may still get financial support from your parents, but you're still grown. Now if you're still living under the same roof as your parents, that may be different.

But in my book, if you're 18 and away at college, you're grown.