So the new pimp game is being a born again Virgin? Lol

[Fiyah]

I am rolling with Founder on the portion of this I can identify with...paying for college. I helped my son get his band scholarship (he got it primarily because of my relationship with the then band director at sTu because he stunk up the audition). Once he got in school and learned the game he took over from there (apartment movie bootlegger, cd bootlegger and he played in multiple ensembles). At one point he was getting so much money out of the music department that the head of the music department told the band director he was going to have to limit my son because he was getting more money than some of the music majors.

I filled in the gaps for him but the small loans I signed for he paid back. He purchased his own car (I helped with insurance down payment which he promptly paid back).

Equip them and turn them loose. I will be a safety net but not footing the entire bill. As a result he graduated in 4 years and was pissed he did not do it in 3.5 (he did not find out about the hours he could get during the winter break until it was too late).

The one thing you did and what he's seems to not be willing to do is help his child. I'm not saying he has to do everything or even pay for everything. It just seems to be irresponsible to not want to guide your children past their 18th birthday because you get off the hook for paying child support.

 

[Fiyah]

I paid my own way through college.

My parents dayum sure aint give me any money for college

Although they may not have had to pay your way through college, they did some kind of support for you. Where did you stay between breaks of semesters? Did they pay for your travel back and forth between home and school on these breaks? I know mines did that for me even though they didn't pay for my college education. They did assist in other ways for me while I was in college. My parents were divorce early on in my life but they didn't stop with me when I reached 18.

 

[chocalate_topaz]

Well, my kid got the FULL college child support ride.In fact, he was behind at one point and when I got a lump sum from something from the dad, I put it on the truck we got him for graduation. That was his half. It worked out. I don't see the hand's off...hell, I helped mine and all the others eating at my house--NCAA fees, dorm supplies, beds, clothes, repaired cars, spending money...

 

[CEE DOG]

I will say they sent me something every now and then, but for the most part I worked. Especially after my freshman year. For the most part I learned how to hustle. I would change breaks, spark plugs, oil and do stuff like starts and alternators. That kept me afloat plus it got me plenty of good night's from women who paid in other ways when they didn't have the money. Lol

Although they may not have had to pay your way through college, they did some kind of support for you. Where did you stay between breaks of semesters? Did they pay for your travel back and forth between home and school on these breaks? I know mines did that for me even though they didn't pay for my college education. They did assist in other ways for me while I was in college. My parents were divorce early on in my life but they didn't stop with me when I reached 18.

 

[CEE DOG]

It was three of us in College at the same time. I know that had to be rough on my parents. Lol

Well, my kid got the FULL college child support ride.In fact, he was behind at one point and when I got a lump sum from something from the dad, I put it on the truck we got him for graduation. That was his half. It worked out. I don't see the hand's off...hell, I helped mine and all the others eating at my house--NCAA fees, dorm supplies, beds, clothes, repaired cars, spending money...

 

[The Founder]

The one thing you did and what he's seems to not be willing to do is help his child. I'm not saying he has to do everything or even pay for everything. It just seems to be irresponsible to not want to guide your children past their 18th birthday because you get off the hook for paying child support.

Fiyah I graduated from high school on a Monday. Went to work on campus 7 days later. Had full scholarship. Sophomore year I wanted a car my folks said you have to work and pay for it. I worked, paid for the car, gas, and insurance. Full time. When the course load was much higher. When I graduated I was unaware that my parents were matching what I paid on my car note. That was the down payment on my first house. They did it because I took responsibility. My son plays 3 instruments and has a chance to earn a FULL RIDE along with working in the band department at GSU. The road is laid out. If he decides to not take that road. Then my support will NOT be there because he is not taking responsibility as a person with supportive opportunities.

He told me once that he did not want to go to college to be in the band. I said you are going for a degree and the band is a way to pay for it so you will leave college debt free. I further asked him what do you want to do then? He said he didn't know. I went and got 5 military recruitment brochures for him. We have enough lazy black males in our society and I will not let mine become a statistic.

Give you another example, my fiance's son is in the 8th grade. The town he stays in charges people an extra $10 on their water bill to go to their house and get their trash can from the house if it is not on the curb to empty their trash on their assigned day. Well he told folks he would charge them $2. He has 25 houses a week...$50. He has a cousin who hand digs graves. They pay his cousin $500 per grave. He pays him $100 per grave. My fiance's son realized that his way out is football. Yet, he has already said his senior year he wants to go in the National Guard because the military is his back up plan to pay for college and get some extra money. He said he learned his work habits from me.

Hell my son...man he gets out of school at noon everyday. Does nothing. I told him to get a job and he said his mom gives him money. Well where does that money come from...in the form of CHILD SUPPORT. The wake up call is coming in a few months. As my father said, "are you going to mildew or bar-b-que." I call it life skills. You go to work for 14 days, you will get something in the form of currency on the 15th. You turn down opportunities you get nothing.

If that's being a mean parent....then hey opinions vary.

 

[The Founder]

Although they may not have had to pay your way through college, they did some kind of support for you. Where did you stay between breaks of semesters? Did they pay for your travel back and forth between home and school on these breaks? I know mines did that for me even though they didn't pay for my college education. They did assist in other ways for me while I was in college. My parents were divorce early on in my life but they didn't stop with me when I reached 18.

You said the magic words....if my son earns a scholarship yes I will help because he took initiative. That's what I have been saying the entire time INITIATIVE. Trying to do it yourself. If he falls short I will pick up the slack because he is trying and utilizing every aspect he can reach at to be successful.

 

[Herbert77060]

The one thing you did and what he's seems to not be willing to do is help his child. I'm not saying he has to do everything or even pay for everything. It just seems to be irresponsible to not want to guide your children past their 18th birthday because you get off the hook for paying child support.

I did not get that from what he said.

 

[Herbert77060]

I will say they sent me something every now and then, but for the most part I worked. Especially after my freshman year. For the most part I learned how to hustle. I would change breaks, spark plugs, oil and do stuff like starts and alternators. That kept me afloat plus it got me plenty of good night's from women who paid in other ways when they didn't have the money. Lol

Only you Cee

 

[The Founder]

The one thing you did and what he's seems to not be willing to do is help his child. I'm not saying he has to do everything or even pay for everything. It just seems to be irresponsible to not want to guide your children past their 18th birthday because you get off the hook for paying child support.

Fiyah would you pay for your child's college education if you knew that they had a FULL scholarship and all they had to do was show their face...but they decided not go?

See I'm not telling my son that all he has to do is show up because that would inhibit him. I have already helped him by nurturing the relationship and setting up the stage for him. It's on him now. As I told him if he gets out of school at noon...either go to work or stay at school and work on your music. Man, shit, his momma told him to come home. SMH