Band Director's Funniest Moments


Bass1

True Musician
Originally posted by philharmonic
Did I Say That?????:blush:

You MUST have me confused with someone else!!!
Yeah you said that. Phil got on us for messin with krank (actually krank started it).

Phil: Hold the horns up in front of you. PUT EM UP!!!!
A crab is our section had his horn low
Phil: You bet not drop it!!!!!
Crab: I'm gettin tired.
Bass1: We can do it.
Phil: Are you sorry mf's!!!! Keep em up.
Member of krank: Ha Ha!
Phil: Y'all playin around like yall don't have no f**n sense. Y'all f***n up. We have a game comin up.

Bass1 arm was hurtin.
Bass1: Shoot! My arm (but kept the horn up).

Now that I remember.
 

Chi-Tone

Intellectual and Musician
Speaking of Crab Brothers....

Band Room, Crab Week, Day 4, 2000

By this time tons of people were getting irritated right along the inner thighs from marching so much and so hard. Not to mention those messed up shorts that don't hug you right. We were in the band room playing music when it all went down. It goes a little something like this:

(Band Playing Music)
(Band Stops....And Down)

Mr. J: See Docta...that's what I'm talkin' bout. We here!(points at his eyes, then to us) Bet you crabs didn't know you could do that huh?

Crabs: All in snyc.. No Sir(Boy were we together)

Mr. J: Alright, I passed out this tune because it's a killa. Everyone pull up "Together Again"

Crabs: Pulling up music from stands.

Mr. J: Everyone got it out?

Crabs: Yes Sir

Mr. J: Good. Let's play! One...two.....one...two...ready..
(interrupted by the back band door opening. My Crab Brother Walks in.)

Mr. J: What is it son?

CB: They didn't have the ointment, Sir!

Crabs: All Die Laughing(wipping our smiles, and then laughing again.)

Even Mr. J was chuckling, trying hard not to hold it in. Yes sir, my crab brother was chaffed no doubt. And that's how he got his crab name Chafe.
 
S

SUPAKAT69

Guest
Re: Speaking of Crab Brothers....

Originally posted by Chi-Tone
Mr. J: Good. Let's play! One...two.....one...two...ready..
(interrupted by the back band door opening. My Crab Brother Walks in.)

Mr. J: What is it son?

CB: They didn't have the ointment, Sir!

Crabs: All Die Laughing(wipping our smiles, and then laughing again.)

Even Mr. J was chuckling, trying hard not to hold it in. Yes sir, my crab brother was chaffed no doubt. And that's how he got his crab name Chafe.

:lol: Boy ya'll SU peeps got some stories for that azz.......I'm laughing so hard, I can't even think of any of ours........
 
T

The Artist

Guest
Damn, yall told it all about Doc!!!! It's never a dull moment in SU's band and especially when Doc is on the podium!
 

Satchmo97

HATER HURTER
97' HERITAGE BOWL
WE STOP TO SOME ALL YOU CAN EAT STEAK HOUSE OUTSIDE ATLANTA. EVERYONE GETS WHAT THEY WANNA EAT AND THEN DOC COMES AROUND LOOKING AT PEOPLES PLATES CALLING US ALL NI***S CAUSE WE IN A STEAK HOUSE EATING FRIED CHICKEN AND OTHER STUFF HE MADE ME AND SOME OTHER PEOPLE GET UP AND GET THE DAYUM STEAK THEN HE STARTED TALKING BOUT ZIPPING US FOR IT. ALL WE COULD DO IS LAUGH AT HIM. CAUSE WE STILL ATE OUR CHICKEN.
 
S

SUPAKAT69

Guest
Originally posted by Satchmo97
97' HERITAGE BOWL
WE STOP TO SOME ALL YOU CAN EAT STEAK HOUSE OUTSIDE ATLANTA. EVERYONE GETS WHAT THEY WANNA EAT AND THEN DOC COMES AROUND LOOKING AT PEOPLES PLATES CALLING US ALL NI***S CAUSE WE IN A STEAK HOUSE EATING FRIED CHICKEN AND OTHER STUFF HE MADE ME AND SOME OTHER PEOPLE GET UP AND GET THE DAYUM STEAK THEN HE STARTED TALKING BOUT ZIPPING US FOR IT. ALL WE COULD DO IS LAUGH AT HIM. CAUSE WE STILL ATE OUR CHICKEN.

Dude tried to zip ya'll for what ya'll were eating!!! :eek:
Off the hook!!!
 

SUtrp96

HBCU SCREAMING CHAMP 99'
Hell yeah you would get zipped for eating wrong!!!

The way DOC sees it is, he don't like feeding us much so he can pocket more money...SO when we go to an all you can eat buffet, he want us to eat the best shat he feels that is on the buffet. I guess he wants us to feel good about eating the best on a buffet...

That muddafugga got made at me because I went got my lunch, had 2 drinks..and my desert at my table..

He told me
DOC~ Who the FUQUE taught you how to eat?

SUtrpt96~What you mean DOC?

DOC~ Why the Fuque you got all the food on your plate?

Sutrpt96~ I got it all so I won't have to get up again.....Besides this is all you can eat DOC, so you only paying one time for me to eat...LOL

DOC~ With your smart azz, you right though...glad you got it together, I thought your azz was trying to break me....

I was like:confused:
 
S

SUPAKAT69

Guest
Originally posted by SUtrp96
DOC~ Why the Fuque you got all the food on you plate?

Sutrpt96~ I got it all so I won't have to get up again.....Besides this is all you can eat DOC, so you only paying one time for me to eat...LOL

DOC~ With you smart azz, you right though...glad you got it together, I thought your azz was trying to break me....

I was like:confused:

WTF??? :goof:
Mane, that dude ain't got no sense!! When I met him I would have never thought....I've heard the storiess but Dayum!!! :eek2:

Bob Hope send help!! :emlaugh:
 

Chi-Tone

Intellectual and Musician
SUtrp96, and Satchmo 97,

I can relate. I'm also bustin' a gut laughing at how Doc was even funnier back in you guy's days.:lmao: :lmao:
 

SUtrp96

HBCU SCREAMING CHAMP 99'
Who ever heard of stealing sleep?

During band Camp can't remember which year I know he said it two of the years I marched.

But during band camp, we all have our rooms we stay in, and it is usually our room for the semester.....But how ever some people forget to feel out their housing papers, and needs DOC help to get a room.......

SO DOC has a roaster of everyone staying on campus. So he was giving out the meal card to the people that signed their name saying they stayed on camus. However the housing list differed from the People that signed up for the meal cards, in other words it should have been the same people.

SO DOC comes to a conclusion that he had about 6 peoples not sign up for housing may have been more. SO DOC asked them where were they staying

DOC~ So, where are yall staying....if yall don't have a room?

NO HOUSING GROUP~ with such and such, sleeping on the floor.

DOC~ yall better get yall shat and get out of there, I ain't going to have yall stealing no sleep.

THE BAND~ was like:confused: then was like:lmao:
 

O'Bladerunner

And Down!
Wasn't it Smuttie who got slammed in the band hall? Po CB, they set him up to wrestle another CB who was twice his size. That's why that's my ni**a.

PS- Anyone seen SPIKE Tyson lately?
 

smallone

soulstar
My crab year Fall 1998 getting ready to go on the field at the Southern Heritage Classic:

Magruder: "You ready baby?!!"

Binky: "Yes, Sir. I'm ready!!"

Magruder: "Naw. You ain't ready for these kats are you?"

Binky: "Yes, Sir. I'm always ready!!"

Magruder slugs my CB in the stomach and says: "You still a CRAB!!"
 

Jagtone97

SU Band - Crab Fall 97
Originally posted by O'Bladerunner
Wasn't it Smuttie who got slammed in the band hall? Po CB, they set him up to wrestle another CB who was twice his size. That's why that's my ni**a.

Yeah, and toward the end of the match Spook put Smut in the Razor Edge and Mombo came flying off one of the chairs with one of them Harlem Heat kicks!
All the crabs was scared.:eek2:
 
S

SUPAKAT69

Guest
Originally posted by smallone
My crab year Fall 1998 getting ready to go on the field at the Southern Heritage Classic:

Magruder: "You ready baby?!!"

Binky: "Yes, Sir. I'm ready!!"

Magruder: "Naw. You ain't ready for these kats are you?"

Binky: "Yes, Sir. I'm always ready!!"

Magruder slugs my CB in the stomach and says: "You still a CRAB!!"

Poor Bink........!!! :lol:

Homecoming '00.........the crabs got caught kickin it at the club. So we decided that these kats was gonna drink after the part....so we made them drink a gang of Everclear........It was two crabs....Fruity & J5.......BOy them boys were fuuuuuuuugggged up!!! :D They set one of them boys on the bench on my porch and started bouncing a basketball off of his head......then they went in my kitchen and got some syrup and pured it on the other guy.......:lol: They was like "Sypin' on some Siz-urp!!" The crab started crying.......!!! :bawling:
The next morning......we watched the tape of us torturing the crabs (the night before)......One of my roomates B.P. that played trumpet was like: Man, Monk ain't ish......."he was talking noise because he was salty becasue he threw up on himself the night before.........he and Monk (mellophone) had been beefing all week....so Monk came out of the kitchen, set the phone down and was like "I thought I told you to stop talking ish.....".....then Monk picked up a broomstick and cocked it back like he was gonna hit B.P.......B.P. was like "Aw Monk.....you ain't gonna do ish!!"

Monk cocked the broomstick back......and layed a slapshot on B.P.'s face like Wayne Gretzky.......!!! :lol: I howled with laughter and ran outside dying....I missed when they started fighting....I had already seen enough!!! :goof:
 

Verdict

"Jay"
*The saxophones are playing the run to "Knights By Knights"....*

*Mr. Magruder then, Dr. Magruder now, goes down the line asking each person to play....*

*He gets to me....*

I play it hoping I don't tear it up. I play it right.

*He gets to the next person....*

She tears it up.

Dr. Magruder: "Okay, let's try that again. 1, 2, ready, play...."

*Keep in mind, this song should already be memorized....*

She still tore it up.

Dr. Magruder: "Got-dayum it........okay, next."

He had this mean, disappointed look on his face and that crap had me rollin' cause' he straight clowned on that girl.

One thing I hated, was to get clowned at band practice.
 

Verdict

"Jay"
*The band was going over one of Dr. Magruder's "new" tunes....*

*The trumpets were messing up on the melody....*

*Dr. Magruder gives them another try....*

*They still messed up on the melody....*

Dr. Magruder gets upset and says in a calm, but fierce voice....

"Put up my music, I ain't gonna let ya'll f*** up my tune. Write your own s*** and f*** that up, but don't f*** up mine."

And walked out the band room.

At first it wasn't that funny, but it did make you say, "Dayum!!"
 

Bass1

True Musician
This one really had us laughing

JG: Stop!!!!
Drum majors blow whistle
JG: What are you doing?!
Band student: I don't know
JG: You telling me that you can't pick your feet up?
Student: (mumbles)
JG: What's your major?
Student: Huh?
JG: I said what's your major?
Student: Uh...music.
JG: MUSIC?!!! Get the "L" off the field!!!!!

Graham will be pissed off if a student that is a music major and can't march worth nothin or play.
 

Jagtone97

SU Band - Crab Fall 97
Originally posted by Satchmo97
HEY ARTIST AND JAGTONE ARE YALL GONNA GO TO MORGAN CITY?

Most definantly! Morgan City is Feb. 10th.

We also are going to lafayette the night before and we're doing the tuesday parade and the lake charles parade tuesday night.
 
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