Abuse


Re: Re: Re: Let's keep this real

Originally posted by Ntelekt
But Jag4Life?.he is the MAN, so its? okay that he was stabbed!
If he even laid a single finger on that woman?he is JUST PLAIN WRONG!!! :mad:
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Jag4life. Sorry to hear about that, she deserves to get the worse punishment.

Nk- Quit reaching:D She is dead wrong for stabbing him, and hopefully the situation I am speaking of does not get to that point which is why I started this topic
 
Good Thread

I don't believe in abusive relationships. I also don't believe in putting my hands on no man, not in that way, that is. ;) My mama taught me long ago, never to put my hands on any man, especially a black man because they will, in most cases hit yo ass back.

If a man puts his hands on me in a way that's not to my liking, consequences will be suffered greatly on his part. Therefore, it would be in his best interests not to have even thunk it.
 



Originally posted by Ms. Jag4Jag
This is not about me verbally abusing someone.


This is about a fool thinking he is Mike Tyson on a woman. EVEN the fool who hits the other person SHOULD think, I don't love anybody that I can handle like this....and THAT person should move on. You can't possiblly love someone that you abuse over and over....I can't love nobody who shows me that kind of treatment.
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The ONLY reason I posed that question to you is because of the ?Christ-like? reference you made, which pretty much looked to say:
?If you do something regarding someone that Christ probably wouldn?t do, you do NOT love that person?.
IF that reference wasn't made...I wouldnt' have asked. :)

And as far as ?over and over?, I still unclear on the response to a one time/first time occurrence.
 
Originally posted by kellis
89 did the man come to realize he had a problem on his own or did the woman threaten to leave?
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Both, after the 3rd abuse she left and he realized he had a problem, but still feels she should be the "wife to him"
 
Re: Re: Re: Re: Let's keep this real

Originally posted by kellis
Any woman who stays in THAT situation needs help HERSELF.
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She is getting help, because she can't understand why she is still there.
 
Re: Re: Let's keep this real

Originally posted by jag4life
My cousin is in ICU because he was stabbed by his wife and step-daughter. He should have beat both of their arses, but he is out on parole so he is not trying to go back.
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Sorry to hear that
I posted my questions because I don't want the situation I know of to get that point. Your cousin will be in my prayers.
 
I'ma put this out there. Some women talk so much isht to a man, and get mad and start throwing punches and blows, that he really does need to slap the dog isht out of her to get her to stfu. I have seen arguments between couples where I have said, "I know you're too good of a guy to beat her ass. Want me to do it for you?" I mean, some women take that "real men don't hit women" isht for granted.

On the flip side, if he is beating her ass because he doesn't have control, or because he was counting on rain and the sun comes out, then he might need help, but she needs to get the hell out. One of them mofos is gone end up DEAD.

My brothers have been known to tell guys that I was serious with,"I can beat her ass. YOU CAN'T." Then they tell me, "you can isht talk up on an ass whippin' if you wanna. You're on your own, there. Now, if that nigra just hittin' to be hittin', or tripping off some bullisht, then you call."

Fortunately, I have never had to make that call.
 
89, if she feels that way then more power to her. Like I said, God gave me five senses and I'm going to use them. She's not going to be much of a wife to him if he one day decides to bash her brains in. Hit me once, shame on you, hit me twice, shame on me....
 
Re: Re: Re: Let's keep this real

Originally posted by 89comSUgrad
Nk-I am not playing both sides, I only made that statement about women being physically abusive before you would make it:D

<font color=maroon>89:

I didn't have to say it.
It was an obvious fact to most on here that I was already thinking it! :lol:</font>

In my opinion nothing warrants physical abuse be it from a man or a woman. Abuse is abuse whether it's physical or emotional; however putting your hands or any part of your body on anyone for any reason is crossing the line.

<font color=maroon>Yeah, abuse IS abuse...but let's be honest:
it's not really looked at abuse until someone puts their hands on someone else.....
Plus, most people would never look at themselves as the cause anyway, especially if they are the abusive ones</font>

My stance is this. If your SO says something and you don't agree, does he have the right to beat you until you say what he wants you to say? Arguments can go one or two ways. Either we are going to agree or we are going to agree to disagree.

<font color=maroon>True dat, but you have to look at it the same way in regard to verbal abuse stemming from a disagreement/argument. For the fact that this seems to be a strong attribute to many women, it's easy to see why its' impact and severity is downplayed...;)</font>
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God forbid if any children are in the household and witness the abuses. The children may grow up thinking it's okay to punch someone when another person doesn't agree with him/her.
 
Originally posted by kellis
God forbid if any children are in the household and witness the abuses. The children may grow up thinking it's okay to punch someone when another person doesn't agree with him/her.
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The Children did not see it happen, but they know it happened.
She is getting help to make sure he makes the right decision, so just pray for her.
 
Originally posted by 89comSUgrad
Really depends on how you argue? Being verbal does not have to be abusive, but can you truly compare it against physical abuse? I guess it depends on what you can handle. Some may handle the verbal abuse because they are being just as abusive;
<font color=maroon>I agree...verbal confrontation is not always abuse....but there are times when you have to call spade a spade. That's what I'm talking about. </font>
The forgiving him part really has nothing to do with him, it is about her. She forgives because she frees herself, so she can leave him and forgive.

<font color=maroon>And you're right there, too.
I shoulda changed what I said after I posted it. Her forgiving him can help bring about closure to the situation and let her move on with her life....</font>
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My 2cents... having known a couple of abused women and the way they think.. 9 times out of 10 they will think they did something to provoke the man hitting them and if they don't do that action again then he wont hit again. Now in the hitters mind it doesn't matter what she does or says he gonna find some reason, referring back the Vinita's reference,(if the sun it out and he wanted it to rain), to hit her. On both ends there is some real esteem and control issues. She should leave especially if they have kids because abuse is a cycle, who's to say that even with couseling he won't get mad and hit her again.

I don't care how much schit talking someone does words does not equate physical violence. Leave if you don't want to hear what the other person is saying.
 
Originally posted by 89comSUgrad
The Children did not see it happen, but they know it happened.
She is getting help to make sure he makes the right decision, so just pray for her.
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:bawling: :bawling: :bawling: for the children.
 



Originally posted by jelli
My 2cents... having known a couple of abused women and the way they think.. 9 times out of 10 they will think they did something to provoke the man hitting them and if they don't do that action again then he wont hit again. Now in the hitters mind it doesn't matter what she does or says he gonna find some reason, referring back the Vinita's reference,(if the sun it out and he wanted it to rain), to hit her. On both ends there is some real esteem and control issues. She should leave especially if they have kids because abuse is a cycle, who's to say that even with couseling he won't get mad and hit her again.

I don't care how much schit talking someone does words does not equate physical violence. Leave if you don't want to hear what the other person is saying.
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Good Point.

The couple I know of, she knows she does not deserve it, and knows nothing she did should have provoke him. I may ask her to register so she can tell ya'll the full story.
 
Originally posted by Vinita
I'ma put this out there. Some women talk so much isht to a man, and get mad and start throwing punches and blows, that he really does need to slap the dog isht out of her to get her to stfu. I have seen arguments between couples where I have said, "I know you're too good of a guy to beat her ass. Want me to do it for you?" I mean, some women take that "real men don't hit women" isht for granted.

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I figured you'd say something to that effect....:)


...and I appreciate it! :lmao:
 
If it was me there would be 2 licks. He'd hit me & I'd hit the door while calling the Po-Po's. The last whippin I got was in 1984. I'd forgive him AFTER I'd moved out!!!! I feel that if a person stays, the agressor may be fooled into thinking they can do it again. I wouldn't want him to even BEGIN to think that would be acceptable. I'd hate to have to go loco w/ a boiler of hot grits....then plead insanity. :retard:
 
Originally posted by Ntelekt
The ONLY reason I posed that question to you is because of the ?Christ-like? reference you made, which pretty much looked to say:
?If you do something regarding someone that Christ probably wouldn?t do, you do NOT love that person?.
IF that reference wasn't made...I wouldnt' have asked. :)

And as far as ?over and over?, I still unclear on the response to a one time/first time occurrence.
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I understand, but you missed the point.

the "LOVE HER AS CHRIST LOVED THE CHURCH" ....was a DIRECT command from the Bible to HUSBANDS.... The husbands are told to LOVE your wives as Christ loved the church...and the wives were told to HONOR their husbands.... So you have to ask the question "HOW" did Christ love the church? ....Answer: HE DIED FOR IT..... Simple.
 
Originally posted by kellis
God forbid if any children are in the household and witness the abuses. The children may grow up thinking it's okay to punch someone when another person doesn't agree with him/her.
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Girls will grow up thinking it acceptable to be treated like that....

and boys may think it is ok to mistreat another human being.

It is unfair to children when stuck in situations like that.
 
Well, if that nigra catches her across the face on the wrong day, he is subject to die, so I guess that is a pretty accurate reference.

:look:
 
MSJ4J

Believe me, I totally understand where you were coming from.

Physically abusing your wife goes against the DIRECT COMMAND of husbands loving their wives....


...just like verbally abusing your husband goes against the DIRECT COMMAND of wives honoring (respecting) their husbands... ;)

I was with you the entire time! :D
 
Originally posted by Vinita
And you call ME vociferous!
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That's not being vociferous! :p

That's being
analytical
perceptive
explicative
inquisitive
and annotative.....but NOT vociferous! :lmao:


I'm just providing the objectional aspect, that's all.

And no, I am NOT a proponent of physical abuse! :smh:

It's like my boy once said:


"I'm not saying that he shoulda done it...

23509.a.jpg




<font size=4>...but I understand!!!"</font>

:D
 
*lightening this thread up some*

Would my putting down 42seconds of HARD loving be considered abusive? :confused:

I be tryna' knock da' bottom out for 10-15 strokes and then...... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
 
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