Agreed ...minus the profanity.
Mom Who Shames 13-Year-Old Daughter For Posing As Adult On Facebook Goes Viral
- Thread starter Kendrick
- Start date
I can not see the video at work.
Why are you looking at this from the perspective of the mother saving some random 19-year-old instead of her 13-year-old daughter? That;s been your whole focus this whole thread.
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bigmanofds
Well-Known Member
I understand where some of you are coming from as far as the embarrassment of the girl in front of the world, but as a parent you are forced to do unconventional approaches when conventional approaches don’t work anymore. I bet the girl has done something in the past that caused the mother to over react. There has been so many times my kids have done some things and I had to go to my parents and say “You remember that time I thought you over reacted when I did such and such, O.K. now I see why you did that.”
First off, that question is BS! Some situations don't require being a parent (or any other title in particutar) in order to do what's best when all that's needed is to exercise a minimum degree of common sense.
Now, speaking as a parent, I agree with Kendrick. That mother didn't need to go back on Facebook to discipline her child (for the whole world to see) just because her child used social media to commit the offense. It could have been handled in PRIVATE without all the attention.
The Founder
Well-Known Member
Not bullshit at all. The issue is this young lady could have gotten some adult male in BIG trouble and quite frankly she should have warned any man associated with the daughter.
Speaking as a parent of 16 year old male I monitor all of his accounts. Until he is 18 he has no privacy. Some of this shit that is posted by underage kids is fugging ridiculous. Yet, when a kid messes up society quickly looks at the parent wondering where were they?
Now as I stated earlier I support the mother in notifying all of the facebook friends of her daughter's age. The mother should have left out the profanities. If it is was me I would have put up a the video stating to the world that my daughter is not a 19 year old freak but 13. Anyone communicating with her thinking that she is 19 please discontinue communication. Anyone over 18 who still communicates with her I will contact the authorities.
Speaking as a parent of 16 year old male I monitor all of his accounts. Until he is 18 he has no privacy. Some of this shit that is posted by underage kids is fugging ridiculous. Yet, when a kid messes up society quickly looks at the parent wondering where were they?
Now as I stated earlier I support the mother in notifying all of the facebook friends of her daughter's age. The mother should have left out the profanities. If it is was me I would have put up a the video stating to the world that my daughter is not a 19 year old freak but 13. Anyone communicating with her thinking that she is 19 please discontinue communication. Anyone over 18 who still communicates with her I will contact the authorities.
The Founder
Well-Known Member
Man...tell me about it.
major095
ASU4real
Part of the punishment in this case is being blasted on line by mom. I'd be willing to be this isn't the first time she's had problems or concerns about her daughters use of social media and has likely tried other less drastic solutions which led up to this situation. so she took another step, one that will hopefully cause her daughter to think long and hard about doing such nonsense while living under her mother's roof. I take the perspective, does the punishment fit the crime? he daughter put herself out there for the entire world to see. so putting her on blast for the entire world may not be out of order. Yes, that girl has an entire life to live and that video will never go away. what's more important is for mom to get the message across to her daughter and she appears to be trying to do that.
my other question is where is dad? obviously this little girl is seeking attention from men. if dad were giving her the love and attention she needed this likely doesn't happen so there in is potentially the real issue. where is that brother?
my other question is where is dad? obviously this little girl is seeking attention from men. if dad were giving her the love and attention she needed this likely doesn't happen so there in is potentially the real issue. where is that brother?
And that's the very point I'm making...a parent shouldn't give a damn what the hell society is "wondering". Society isn't responsible for the well-being my kids, therefore a parent doesn't have to answer to "society" because of "public" fallout.
My late grandfather said it best. Jokingly, he said, "If a child doesn't get into trouble, something is wrong with that child."
Kids are going to mess up. Messing up is what kids do. It's a part of growing up.
The Founder
Well-Known Member
You have to see the entire video.
The mother, daughter, and step father live in the mother's brother's home and rents a room. The mother admitted to having a felony which has inhibited her from getting a job.... The mother went on to state how much of a man the step-dad was yada yada yada....
The Founder
Well-Known Member
Your grandfather was dead on point!!! I agree...but it goes back to my original point that the mother should have done that because of the WHAT IFs involved. Parents are that white and yellow line on the road. They give you signs when not to cross over....but sometimes a parent has to be that guard rail that does damage to you before more severe damage is done.
major095
ASU4real
without seeing the video...and I won't, I will say that she is still seeking attention from men, realistically as a substitute for the love she's not getting from dad.
96lioness
QUEEN LIONESS!!!
I agree, because there are some things that you should never put on social media, and a 13-year old child taking pics of herself in a bra & panties for grown men is one of those things. This may seem like it should be a private matter (especially to us on the outside looking in), but privacy went out the window the minute that child publicly posted those pics. Mom just finished it by making it publicly known that her child is under-age.
As a mother of 2 daughters, I've had to publicly check my girls when they were in school. I made it known then & there that wherever you act up is where you'll get disciplined. While I didn't curse at them or whoop them in front of the class, I got my point across to each child, and I never had that problem again.
96lioness
QUEEN LIONESS!!!
Kenn, it's one thing to "mess up" at that age, but in this day and time, and with the perverse nature of so many people, this was not a mess up. This child put herself in a position where she could have been kidnapped, raped, killed, or all three. Thankfully, it was caught and handled. Again, many not like the how it was handled, but a lot are not seeing the big picture......it was noticed by a parent and handled. I read on this site too often about how we don't discipline our children, and when we do, someone has something to say about it. As I've heard a lot of posters say on here, people have gotten too sensitive.
96lioness
QUEEN LIONESS!!!
Speaking for myself, maybe because it's the most effective and beneficial and memorable.
The Founder
Well-Known Member
It's logical because this young 13 year old could have been engaging with predators, or innocent men and women who are pursuing her thinking she is of age. Concerning the predators that's self explanatory; but those men and women who want to sex an of age woman this could lead to charges that will take hell and high water to get out of.
I agree that the profanities etc... should not have been there. But as far as putting her on front street about her age was VERY acceptable. Now if anyone contacts her daughter they know how old she is.
96lioness
QUEEN LIONESS!!!
I remember when I found out I would be the single parent responsible for my daughters' lives. I prayed and asked God to give me strength, patience, wisdom, and discipline to raise my girls in a way that He would be pleased. While I never used "time-outs" with my daughters, I do know that it was the wisdom I asked God for that gave me the insight on how to discipline my children based on the incident. I agree with you on your statement, only in my case, it was sometimes I had to use a unconventional approach to get the results needed.
bigmanofds
Well-Known Member
From what you’ve shared about them they seem to be some dynamic young ladies, so the end justifies the means.
This is prophetic ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^. Where's the bowdown smiley????????
jsupop33
Loyalty & Respect
Did any of your parents record your beatings or whatnot and pass the videotape around to their friends when you were growing up? My parents didn't and I did some pretty stupid stuff. I am glad my mom and dad found that it was okay to punish me without millions of people seeing.
dacontinent
Preacher
There was no videotape when I was a kid. When I did something publicly stupid, the nearest adult publicly checked me or any other kid who did it. Was the tactic always necessary? Certainly not. Was the consequence ever forgotten? Certainly not. Have the details been rehearsed to my own children, grandchildren, and any other youngster who will listen? Absolutely.
Different children require differing consequences for their actions - even those who grow-up in the same household. The only parent who really knows if this is what was needed (minus expletives) is the parent involved.
Another way of handling this with similar results (my method of choice) would be to have the child present a scripted rendering of her own confession AND take away her social media access until she reaches adulthood.
That's an easy accusation but not nearly always true. Some kids just do isht.
bigmanofds
Well-Known Member
I can say no also. It was different times with different ways of thinking. When I was 13 kids would have just got PRIVATELY the shit beat out of them for doing what this child did. You do that now you get PUBLICLY arrested. Now we approaching an era where both the parents and kids have been raised with social media. So, old ways of thinking may not be getting the job done anymore.
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skyvolt2000
Well-Known Member
And mind you this is the FOURTH time she has done this. So men already knew she was 13 from the previous 3 times.