Stuff like this is so, so disheartening


Panther88

Panther88

Banned
Up until last night, I <b>volunteered my time and my "good" name/respectability</b> and opened up a junior high gymnasium <b>every</b> single Wednesday and Sunday night so that the youth in the surrounding communities could have something to do (particularly for our youth of color). Mind you, I've been doing this and bending over for this redneck local school district (w/ less than .9% black youth) BEGGING these people for a key to the gym and use of the facilities sometimes way into the a.m. hour the next morning (one morning I stopped play @ ~ 2:00am Monday morning during the summer months). The ONLY thing that the superintendent asked was that there be no drinks/food, no broken facilities, no mis-use of facilities, lights/AC off, etc. which I did and ensured. I implemented very mature rules for playing bball mainly that we all <b>pray</b> before we start and that I talk to to the kids for ~3-5 minutes to lend insight on maturity, responsibility, doing the right thing, talking rightly, being your best, blah blah blah. Also, I tolerated <b>no</b> profanity or <b>belligerence</b> from ANYONE as I would ask them nicely to leave the facility until their attitude was better. Most of the time, the regulars would comply. The ONLY problem that I had once was last summer when some out of towners came down w/ their "thug" behavior and they didn't comply and of course, johnny was right down the street so he and he crew politely came and escorted them off campus. lol I told those guys that they had better have a smile on their face as they were leaving or I would seek to have them prosecuted if they threatened me or any of the "regulars" who attended the sessions. Also, the age limits are that you must be 16 or older to play w/ the "big" boys. There were several UNT/NTCC/TCU guys who would come play along w/ several neighboring high schools/private schools students (girls inclusive). It was a nice mix of young people.

Well, the inevitable happened last night. That same "thug" out of town crew from funky ass Ft Worth came over and I reminded them AGAIN, no profanity or belligerence (fighting) would be tolerated upon their entrance (in a nice way of course :) ). Well, it happened. That one mouth almighty started w/ a <b>*F* you</b> and <b>I'll *F* you up batch....</b> and a few <b>batch azz ni##a this that and the other</b> and these guys started fighting. :( It wasn't just one on one either. It was many on many. I guess it was some type of "turf" battle or something. *sigh* Suburban kids vs city kids or something. :( I on't know.

Last night I was madder than "L" after johnny came and helped disburse the mess and I was very embarrassed. Now I'm just hurt that these young guys didn't understand completely that the local school district or local residents wouldn't give a rat's arse about them or what they do away from campus or their town and now they have no where to go and play bball (getting colder or even during the hot months here). :( I'm also hurt that they didn't completely understand that I was doing this <b>for them and not myself</b> (albeit I did play a lot w/ the young'uns). I could've easily set this thing up solely for OLDER guys (30 and older) but I didn't.

For all of those who've had fights please enlighten me and tell someone who's never ever in his entire life had a physical altercation what the <b>true</b> purpose of throwing your fist against someone's head is supposed to resolve or solve or calling someone out of their name? :confused:

Thanks.

Panthro!
ps
I called the superintendent a few ago and informed him of what happened last night and also informed him that I'd be returning the gym key to him later this evening. I'm done w/ trying to help direct some of these younger guys. :( Bend over backwards for some and look @ how they treat ya'. :(
 
Originally posted by Panthro
For all of those who've had fights please enlighten me and tell someone who's never ever in his entire life had a physical altercation what the <b>true</b> purpose of throwing your fist against someone's head is supposed to resolve or solve or calling someone out of their name? :confused:
Click to expand...

P, you are a upright standing individual! I mean, outside of trying to run over those mormons (sp) on the bicycle. But, hey I guess we all cant be perfect. But anyhoo, you did a good deed.

Now, to answer your above question. I guess it gives the satisfaction of seeing someone go down by the force of your own hands. You know, gladiator stuff. Not trying to resolve any issues, just showing who suppose to be the most dominant.
 



Man, I'm really hurt by this. I bent over backwards and literally had to beg this white guy for a key that others in the community have for <b>their</b> kids (it's that suburban pseudo-white thingy w/ stuff that enhances their kids and doesn't include ours). Maybe beg is too strong of a word. I reminded him that as a tax paying citizen of their sorry community I don't have ANY kids that attend the local school district and I almost couldn't care the hell less what happens w/in the school district outside of where my tax money goes. But, I do want some use out of it and I almost demanded the key for not only OUR kids but I assured him that it was for the benefit of the local kids as well (whites).

I guess that I'm still shell shocked over these kids behavior. Fighting/physical altercations do not solve nor resolve anything. Usually when an argument erupted over a bad call, I'd make them shoot for it and tell them that it was over. They normally complied.

Maybe everyone was just at that level last night. I on't know. One thing's for sure. I'm sure the chief of police wants to talk to me today as well as the superintendent. I understand/understood the liabilities of what I was doing on public school property. :(
 
Thanks for reminding me. lol

I was slightly embarrased by that behavior. :( But still, they caught me on the wrong morning. When someone oversteps their boundary w/ me (especially w/ something <b>that is mine like my home/vehicle/children/last name bearer :rolleyes: </b>), I get real defensive. Like fighting mad but I try to take steps to resolve legally. :( I would hope that I wouldn've fought those 2 guys that morning. :shame:
 
Poor Panthro....you did what you could & now it's been thrwarted by the actions of "thugs." It's not the regular guys fault that the fight broke out so why should they have no place to play ball?

To answer your question. I think there's a natural instinct for kids to hit that starts at a young age. It they aren't taught not to use physical force they end up thinking that's the way to solve all issues. That mentality + testosterone = fight. :cool:
 
Take a deep breath before you make this decision

Sometimes, helping others doesn't go the way we planned and we react from our gut. This is classic "us"...shut down if folks can't act right instead of trying to manage them without them knowing it.

Sounds like what you are doing is needed. Maybe, you need to step up the security type issues a notch, though. Maybe have the students fill out an information form..parents info, etc., then have some basic ID's made (Business cards) and only those with the ID's get in. That way if schatt goes down, they already know where to go. Would entail you having some help at the door to monitor things.

I don't think you should give up, just make the troublemakers get on. And believe me, it's sad but giving our folks a lot of paper work will make them give up every time.

Hope you try it again.
 
Originally posted by Panthro

and also informed him that I'd be returning the gym key to him later this evening. I'm done w/ trying to help direct some of these younger guys. :( Bend over backwards for some and look @ how they treat ya'. :(
Click to expand...


So in other words...........You're a Quitter.

Pathro do me a favor dawg. Look on the net for a poem called

"SEE IT THROUGH" by Edgar A. Guest
Dont ever quit, expecially if it helps our Youth of America.
 
Hey man...........

You did something most people wouldn't do, which is be responsible for something, when there's no 'personal gain' attached to it... Opening the gym for the kids was a NOBLE thing to do. And I congratulate you for your efforts......

Be proud of the lives you may've saved by having the gym available (for the time it WAS open).....

You tried something and it worked for awhile..... And you should always be proud of that...... But now you have to decide if this situation (the fight) will cause you not to attempt similar things in the future. And if so, then fine ('cause you've already done something) But if not, then good-luck on your 'next' endeavor (in that area).....

You're gave back, and that's what counts....... :nod:

Keep ya head up, Ronnie......

:dude:
 
That was a good thing you were trying to do, but let's face it P~, you can't be everything to everybody. Some kids/adults are just plain ole thugs w/ninja mentality and there's really nothing you or I can do about it. Also, a lot of us are raised to fight. Think about it, what'd your mother/father tell you growing up, "if someone hits you, hit em back." Especially little boys. That's just the way it is...and kids from the projects tend to fight more than anyone, don't really know why though.
 
Originally posted by Taylor-Made'90
Hey man...........

You did something most people wouldn't do, which is be responsible for something, when there's no 'personal gain' attached to it... Opening the gym for the kids was a NOBLE thing to do. And I congratulate you for your efforts......

Be proud of the lives you may've saved by having the gym available (for the time it WAS open).....

You tried something and it worked for awhile..... And you should always be proud of that...... But now you have to decide if this situation (the fight) will cause you not to attempt similar things in the future. And if so, then fine ('cause you've already done something) But if not, then good-luck on your 'next' endeavor (in that area).....

You're gave back, and that's what counts....... :nod:

Keep ya head up, Ronnie...... :lmao:

:dude:
Click to expand...


Good post, TM.
 
Panthro, I feel your frustrations.


And this same mentality is NATIONWIDE in our Black communities. So if this mentality is nationwide in our communities then it has to have the same source for these kids to posses this condition of lack of civility. Am I wrong for making that conclusion? Some young Black males are on a rollercoaster to hell. I hate to see young brothas and now young sistahs act this way. Maybe some of them see "acting a fool" as a way being hip or cool. I don't know... It just hurt like hell for me to see the young bruhs and sistahs act this way.
 
Think about the kids who really enjoy what you do, and would be really disappointed to have you stop what you're doing before you make any rash decisions. Where you live isn't that large, so most people know each other. Here are some suggestions:

1. Have the PARENTS of the kids IN THE AREA who want to play fill out some kind of information form (name, addy, celly, emergency contact, etc.), and keep it with you WHENEVER the gym is open. I have something similar I can send you, if you want me to.

2. If someone from OUTSIDE of the area comes, they MUST be vouched for by one of your regulars, and ONLY that person can play. That way, you don't have groups of outsiders coming in starting mess.

3. Ask for parent/community volunteers to come help you when you're in the building, so you're not the only one in authority there.

4. Set RULES and STANDARDS for when the gym is open. Give a copy to EVERY KID, have them sign something saying they received it, and ENFORCE that shat!

Just some suggestions. I'd hate for the good kids to lose what they enjoy all because of some fugg ups.
 
Since he says he starts with a prayer, you know who will show up.

Panthro,
In the Bible, Paul wrote in Romans 7:21 I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me.

That is the story you just wrote. You were going good and evil showed up to throw a monky wrench in it.

Keep your head up. I agree with V. Get some other parents over to help you out. Maybe call up some of your boyz and get them involved in the community work that you are doing. Check stupidity at the door. Get phone numbers and verify them before you let them in. When they get out of hand, call their parents and make a report.

Dont give up brother, hang in there, and keep the faith. Know what you do is Good and Know that God rewards faithfulness.

:D:D:D:D
 
I wasn't surprised by that crew from Ft Worth. It was some of the regulars behavior that caught me off guard. <b>They</b> were the ones who were taunting/trying to start stuff. :mad: I was very disappointed. Not all of them, just a few. Maybe they were having a bad day.

It's my fear that the superint will do his best to explain ethics/school district policy/how he bent over backwards for us/etc. and then require me to return the key. This was the 2nd incident that occurred in the last 3+ years of which the previous one was solely those guys from Ft Worth. Now that I think about it, it was the behavior/taunting of the local guys that set those FW guys off. :(

The future of the gym opening depends on what happens later this evening after meeting w/ "chief" and the superint. I was actually gonna' try to do a fund raiser next month for needy families for the holidays/post January era by attempting to host a 5on5 tourney by having teams donate 20$. Oh well... :(

There aren't too many of "us" in the area, so... And, if there are, I don't see them. The whites in the area could seriously care the hell less (from what I ascertain). They thought this area exclusive to them I'm sure. Their choice of words when referring to "outsiders" perplexes me. That's why it was only me. It's been "me" for the last 3.5 years. Someone did likewise for me when I was younger, so I felt obligated to do likewise in my free time.

I'm done. :(
 



at least it was fists flying and not bullets.....


like Craig's daddy said, "kids today ain't nothing but a bunch of punks. Always wanting to shoot somebody. In my day, all we had was this (fist)"....lol
 
Those few don't understand the <b>sacrifices</b> that I've made and am making (like leaving work early today to visit w/ those 2 admins). :(

Selfish. Very selfish of them. To ruin it for everyone. :(
 
Originally posted by Panthro
Those few don't understand the <b>sacrifices</b> that I've made and am making (like leaving work early today to visit w/ those 2 admins). :(

Selfish. Very selfish of them. To ruin it for everyone. :(
Click to expand...


P~,

Do you really think those hoodlums give a rat's tail about the other kids there, or you for that matter? :rolleyes:

GOD will bless you for your kind heart and spirit...don't worry about it.
 
Here you go Panthro. You will be blessed for you hard work, but dont give up on the good kids because of a couple of band apples.

See It Through
Edgar Guest

When you're up against a trouble,
Meet it squarely, face to face;
Lift your chin and set your shoulders,
Plant your feet and take a brace.
When it's vain to try to dodge it,
Do the best that you can do;
You may fail, but you may conquer,
See it through!

Black may be the clouds about you
And your future may seem grim,
But don't let your nerve desert you;
Keep yourself in fighting trim.
If the worst is bound to happen,
Spite of all that you can do,
Running from it will not save you,
See it through!

Even hope may seem but futile,
When with troubles you're beset,
But remember you are facing
Just what other men have met.
You may fail, but fall still fighting;
Don't give up, whate'er you do;
Eyes front, head high to the finish.
See it through!
 
Panthro,

I tip my hat to you my brother because you tried to make a difference.Tweak your plan some as some have suggested but remember that to whom much is given much is required.Keep on keeping on.If not at this venture,then brainstorm of another way to help our youth.
I'm mentoring at four schools this semester and it's quite rewarding.I'm going to eat lunch with a mentee on tomorrow.Find your niche my brother because there are needs everywhere.
 
While in the meeting with the Sup and Police, ask about an off duty officer staying on site on the open gym nights, or regular stops by the officers on patrol. This would give a sense of security to all and offer a deterent to bad behavior.

Maybe hook up with the Black Law Officers Association in the city and work out something with them. It gives them a service project, and you have help.

Since all the players are 16 and over, you could have a sign in sheet at the door. They would have to provide a legal ID ( DL or school ID). If you could find some local businessmen willing to donate, the kids in school could receive simple gifts for maintaining a good g.p.a. or school attendence.

I understand your frustration, but I urge you not to quit while still upset about what happened. Think about it, talk to some of the regulars and try to "See It Through".

Keep your Head to the Sky.
 
Thats a good thing you were doing and I would hate to see it get squashed, thats what these kids need. You have a lot of suggestions so if at all possible try to get some to work.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top