JROCK
Preeminent
The "DADDY" of such great prognosticators such as Boni Swami, Nostradamus and an illegitimate child from MIT will grace TSPN with the truth, the truth, and nothing but the truth for the 2003 football season. These predictions are in no way associated with fabrication and any reproduction and contradiction of this material without written consent from the honor society of prognosis is strictly prohibited:
Down and Dirty...To the Nitty Gritty!!!
WEST
1) SOUTHERN U....The Football Jaguars have a distinct advantage at coaching. Dean Big Brother Almighty Pete Richardson winner of 3 out of the last 6 SWAC titles and 9 out of the last 10 Bayou Classics have retired Eddie Robinson and Jacque "Wash" Hughes respectively. There is no reason to believe that Doug Williams will not be his next victim. The SWAC will not be able to contain S.U. team speed. Congress is now considering a bill to increase the speed limit on interstate highways. If passed, the football Jaguars will be able to Jog on interstate highways.
2) grumbling state....losers of 3 out of the last 6 SWAC titles and Brugene led tigers are over weight and needs to consider slim fast as a partner to the football program. The tigers are not going anywhere fast but not on purpose. Their one dimensional offense is not championship caliber and was on the verge of losing to NAIA Langston before the football gods gave them a reprieve. To add insult to injury the football program was riddled with scandle including slapping a visiting coach for walking through a ballon inflated tunnel. The former superbowl MVP coached team have not decided whether they wil play in the Bayou Classic this year. Their PR Dept state...."we are the icon of BCF and losing the BC 9 out 10 times on NBC is not conducive to our image."
3) TXSU....The only thing positive about this program is that they have a Pete Richardson and S.U. disciple. Look for them to upset Jackson State a spineLess ball club that ran from the Houstonians for several years.
4) PVAM...Even though this football team sucks better than a hoover, they will give up the basement for a minute. The NCAA most losing program understand the "even the sun shines on a dog @&& once in a while" philosophy.
5) APB....This school has really great facilities & all games can be broadcast over the internet (sniker).
EAST
1) AAMU....Winner of 2 out of the last 3 Eastern Division title, the former D-2 Bulldogs have moved to the SWAC and have effectively disenfranchised former SWAC power jackson st. With my great psychic powers I saw this comming when jsu started traveling to d-2 New Haven. The Dawgs are led by former superbowl player AJ. At press time he was still fuming about not being able to play in the game. Look for the Dawgs to make a decision on the starting QB on one of their 6 practice fields.
2) tie jackson st....the 4th best football playing school in Mississippi has a new boss at the helm. He is the best friend of the AD. Apparenly the AD at bama state and jsu are country cousins and matriculated in the same environment. kINT, their turnover leading veteran Q.B. is a true Jacksonian that exemplifies all that is Buffalo. The 4 year starter is poised to be just that without a championship. Like urban blight & a condemned home after Rooster & Dumbell is finish with the football program it will need to be bulldozed. These two give new meaning to gentrification. Many jsue alums have called Rev. Ike and requested that he remove stains and spirits from the football program. Thank goodness Josh Moon does not write for the Clarion-Ledger!
2) Tie... Bama State....Dangerous ball club and the mayham will bring the team closer together. This is not good news for jackson state. Josh Moon will have an epiphany and become chairman of the "Joes Must go Committee." Look for Get Ready to send this man an e-mail with cyber terrorist threats with contention of possessing cyber weapons of mass destruction. The 5 brothers Cole wins have made most jsu fans irrational and GR is the drum major.
4) MVSU...Their fate will be sealed early and tempo set after a drubbing by the most revered football team in BCF. This massacre will occur in Jackson MS. These devils are not scaring anyone but maybe Delta State. Maybe the 20 year anniversary of Rice-Totem combo will give these misfits motivation.....NOT (no championship then or now).
5) Alcorn State.....If you are 1-2 against D-2 Fort Valley and travel to d-2 schools like your country cousins from jackson, your arse belong in the basement. In the basement you can sell the little hair that you have been fortunate enough to scalp. The good Dr. will needy plenty medicine.
SCG Champion.........
SOUTHERN UNIVERSITY......No Suprise here!
S.outhern W.ins A.nother C.hampionship!
Down and Dirty...To the Nitty Gritty!!!
WEST
1) SOUTHERN U....The Football Jaguars have a distinct advantage at coaching. Dean Big Brother Almighty Pete Richardson winner of 3 out of the last 6 SWAC titles and 9 out of the last 10 Bayou Classics have retired Eddie Robinson and Jacque "Wash" Hughes respectively. There is no reason to believe that Doug Williams will not be his next victim. The SWAC will not be able to contain S.U. team speed. Congress is now considering a bill to increase the speed limit on interstate highways. If passed, the football Jaguars will be able to Jog on interstate highways.
2) grumbling state....losers of 3 out of the last 6 SWAC titles and Brugene led tigers are over weight and needs to consider slim fast as a partner to the football program. The tigers are not going anywhere fast but not on purpose. Their one dimensional offense is not championship caliber and was on the verge of losing to NAIA Langston before the football gods gave them a reprieve. To add insult to injury the football program was riddled with scandle including slapping a visiting coach for walking through a ballon inflated tunnel. The former superbowl MVP coached team have not decided whether they wil play in the Bayou Classic this year. Their PR Dept state...."we are the icon of BCF and losing the BC 9 out 10 times on NBC is not conducive to our image."
3) TXSU....The only thing positive about this program is that they have a Pete Richardson and S.U. disciple. Look for them to upset Jackson State a spineLess ball club that ran from the Houstonians for several years.
4) PVAM...Even though this football team sucks better than a hoover, they will give up the basement for a minute. The NCAA most losing program understand the "even the sun shines on a dog @&& once in a while" philosophy.
5) APB....This school has really great facilities & all games can be broadcast over the internet (sniker).
EAST
1) AAMU....Winner of 2 out of the last 3 Eastern Division title, the former D-2 Bulldogs have moved to the SWAC and have effectively disenfranchised former SWAC power jackson st. With my great psychic powers I saw this comming when jsu started traveling to d-2 New Haven. The Dawgs are led by former superbowl player AJ. At press time he was still fuming about not being able to play in the game. Look for the Dawgs to make a decision on the starting QB on one of their 6 practice fields.
2) tie jackson st....the 4th best football playing school in Mississippi has a new boss at the helm. He is the best friend of the AD. Apparenly the AD at bama state and jsu are country cousins and matriculated in the same environment. kINT, their turnover leading veteran Q.B. is a true Jacksonian that exemplifies all that is Buffalo. The 4 year starter is poised to be just that without a championship. Like urban blight & a condemned home after Rooster & Dumbell is finish with the football program it will need to be bulldozed. These two give new meaning to gentrification. Many jsue alums have called Rev. Ike and requested that he remove stains and spirits from the football program. Thank goodness Josh Moon does not write for the Clarion-Ledger!
2) Tie... Bama State....Dangerous ball club and the mayham will bring the team closer together. This is not good news for jackson state. Josh Moon will have an epiphany and become chairman of the "Joes Must go Committee." Look for Get Ready to send this man an e-mail with cyber terrorist threats with contention of possessing cyber weapons of mass destruction. The 5 brothers Cole wins have made most jsu fans irrational and GR is the drum major.
4) MVSU...Their fate will be sealed early and tempo set after a drubbing by the most revered football team in BCF. This massacre will occur in Jackson MS. These devils are not scaring anyone but maybe Delta State. Maybe the 20 year anniversary of Rice-Totem combo will give these misfits motivation.....NOT (no championship then or now).
5) Alcorn State.....If you are 1-2 against D-2 Fort Valley and travel to d-2 schools like your country cousins from jackson, your arse belong in the basement. In the basement you can sell the little hair that you have been fortunate enough to scalp. The good Dr. will needy plenty medicine.
SCG Champion.........
SOUTHERN UNIVERSITY......No Suprise here!
S.outhern W.ins A.nother C.hampionship!
