Agree or Disagree...Live 2gether before Marriage
- Thread starter aamuprettywoman
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JSTUS
THE WARHORSES!!!
So true. It was your decision about your life. They still supported you after you made your decision, even though they felt differently about the issue. That's unconditional love. We should all strive to surround ourselves with family and friends that love us unconditionally and support us through it all.
Getting a little off the subject. I'm one that believes that God occasionally put us in situations that allow us to see who loves us and are there for us unconditionally or just because of this or that or through this or that.
GramTigress
Kelsey's Mom
Shacking
MY POV:
I, personally, am not going to do it. My cousin lived with her ex-husband for 2 years, prior to their marriage, and she said he changed after they were married. Based on what I've heard married people say and some books I've read, people are subject to change after they are married regardless of whether they lived together or not.
MY POV:
I, personally, am not going to do it. My cousin lived with her ex-husband for 2 years, prior to their marriage, and she said he changed after they were married. Based on what I've heard married people say and some books I've read, people are subject to change after they are married regardless of whether they lived together or not.
aamuprettywoman
AAMU all day every day!
Interesting...
I asked the question because I know people do it for a lot of reasons and that happened to be a topic on The View yesterday.
I've never lived with anyone I was in a relationship (dating..etc.)I've always figured like my folks used to say..."If you're good enough to live with...you're good enough to marry." True..true..
I think you can find out how a person really is before you get married without actually living with him or her. I believe everyone knows if his or her mate's habits and lifestyles while you're dating. You know if he or she is a clean, neat, organized, or dirty, filthy, non-considerate and lazy withouth living with them. You visit, you spend the night...You know...you may just "choose" to be in denial.
Personally, I tend to lean towards guys who are like me.
A well kept grill is IMPORTANT. It tells me almost all I need to know about you. Don't ask!
If he can do all the things most women do (cooking, cleaning, dry-cleaning..heh heh...cause I ain't ironing), then I
know he doesn't necessarily "need" a woman, he "chooses" to have one for reasons way beyond cooking, cleaning, and sex...etc. The same for me. I don't necessarily "need" a man, I can "choose" to invite someone to partake in my world.
I asked the question because I know people do it for a lot of reasons and that happened to be a topic on The View yesterday.
I've never lived with anyone I was in a relationship (dating..etc.)I've always figured like my folks used to say..."If you're good enough to live with...you're good enough to marry." True..true..
I think you can find out how a person really is before you get married without actually living with him or her. I believe everyone knows if his or her mate's habits and lifestyles while you're dating. You know if he or she is a clean, neat, organized, or dirty, filthy, non-considerate and lazy withouth living with them. You visit, you spend the night...You know...you may just "choose" to be in denial.
Personally, I tend to lean towards guys who are like me.
A well kept grill is IMPORTANT. It tells me almost all I need to know about you. Don't ask!
If he can do all the things most women do (cooking, cleaning, dry-cleaning..heh heh...cause I ain't ironing), then I
know he doesn't necessarily "need" a woman, he "chooses" to have one for reasons way beyond cooking, cleaning, and sex...etc. The same for me. I don't necessarily "need" a man, I can "choose" to invite someone to partake in my world.
MightyDog
Well-Known Member
The female should be incharge when these types of things are discussed. Once the female set the ground rules, then that is the was it ought to be.
Females are taught from birth to be homemakers, don't get homemakers confused with housewives, because it is not the same. Most men are not concerned about developing a home, but a house yes. Therefore, in most cases it is the male who bring all the homemaking bad habits into the marriage. The females who are taught to be homemakers have to put up with a lot of bad habits and spend the first two or three years putting up with men bad habits. If this situation is not recognize early on in the marriage, then a divorce will soon follow. When one speaks about he or she changed; in most cases they did not recognize what was happening to them.
Marriage counselors can help, but too often couples don't think it is necessary.
So folks want to checkout the other person to see what habits they have, but true love comes when these bad habit have to be dealt with. I still have a few, but the homemaker put up with them because by now she figured it will do any good to keep reminding me. You know like leaving things opened and leaving things laying around are just a small example.
Females are taught from birth to be homemakers, don't get homemakers confused with housewives, because it is not the same. Most men are not concerned about developing a home, but a house yes. Therefore, in most cases it is the male who bring all the homemaking bad habits into the marriage. The females who are taught to be homemakers have to put up with a lot of bad habits and spend the first two or three years putting up with men bad habits. If this situation is not recognize early on in the marriage, then a divorce will soon follow. When one speaks about he or she changed; in most cases they did not recognize what was happening to them.
Marriage counselors can help, but too often couples don't think it is necessary.
So folks want to checkout the other person to see what habits they have, but true love comes when these bad habit have to be dealt with. I still have a few, but the homemaker put up with them because by now she figured it will do any good to keep reminding me. You know like leaving things opened and leaving things laying around are just a small example.
aamuprettywoman
AAMU all day every day!
Wisdom speaks....
:lmao: @ Ms.J4J
I'm sorry everything has itz place. I don't like to see things lying around. Even the salt and pepper shakers has its place. I like a neat place. I don't like to have to clean up for company thatz coming. It'll be the same way. Everytime you come, anytime. Plus, I enjoy cleaning things. If I "ever" get married...believe...that person will enjoy or learn to enjoy without pressure doing so too.:swink:
:lmao: @ Ms.J4J
I'm sorry everything has itz place. I don't like to see things lying around. Even the salt and pepper shakers has its place. I like a neat place. I don't like to have to clean up for company thatz coming. It'll be the same way. Everytime you come, anytime. Plus, I enjoy cleaning things. If I "ever" get married...believe...that person will enjoy or learn to enjoy without pressure doing so too.:swink:
J-State Tiger
Senate Candidate #7
Re: well...
Thats a refreshing point of view BB. Most folks dont think that way these days. They just hop in the sack like what.Originally posted by blaquebuterfly
Good point aamuprettywoman? but if you are NOT having sex with your Sig Other before marriage then you are not being a hypocrate are you??? But realistically, if we REALLY break it down from a Biblical perspective than every one of us is a hypocrate. If you tell a ?white lie?, if you eat food when you are not hungry, if you lust, if you judge the actions of others? if you just live and breathe air you are by nature a hypocrate because we ALL fall short of the glory of God.
But I do see your point. That is why I am a great proponent of not doing EITHER before marriage?
But let me not start preaching up in here? I think I did enough of that in the ?2001 birth control for males and females? post.
Banana Puddin'
Ms. Happiness!
My point exactly!! Nah, I don't think I'll be shackin', but he can visit sometimes.