A Question about Funerals


Dr. Sweet NUPE

Dr. Sweet NUPE

New Member
I was in a discussion with my girlfriend not too long ago and we were talking about funerals. I stated that I know what type of casket I want and that I want an extremely short funeral. I'm talking 30 minutes at the most. She stated that funerals are not for the deceased but for the living and I should let my love ones take care of it. I strongly disagree....what's your opinion?
 
While the funeral may be for those who are living, to help them acknowledge those memories of the deceased, I certainly agree with you my frat that we (family members of the deceased, distant relatives, church members, Frat/Soro brothers/sisters, friends, and associates SHOULD abide by the wishes of the person making that request as to what they want regarding their own funeral.

As Blacks, we have all been confronted with request from our parents, grandparents, relatives and friends on the suit & tie/dress or whatever they want to be buried in. For instance, my mother told her children that whatever we did, Do Not put a hat on her head. There are certain songs that she wants the choir to sing nothing more, nothing less and she does not want an open casket and she wants the funeral to be held within four (4) days of her death. This is her request and we will do everything within our power to honor her request.

Just one man's opinion.
 

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The wishes of the deceased should be first priority, but we all know family members are going to run the show in their best interest. You'll be dead and won't know what's going on anyway, so it won't matter much. :rolleyes:

It's SAD, but true.
 
If the deceased was in Christ, then it's a celebration. If not, then it's a moment where we have another chance to give our lives to Christ. Either way, if the deceased made prior requests, they should be considered.

Mine...no girly color flowers. I want dark colored flowers!!! Ok
 
You might not believe it, but when you die, the poeple who know you best will probably respect your wishes.

My father never verbalized his wishes for a funeral, but throughout planning it all (and I DO mean, ALL), every decision I made was tempered by the thought ...

"What would Daddy want?"

It was, therefore, short, to the point, and FUNNY!
 
Well the only thing I have told my family about my funeral is to keep in short, 30-45 minutes. Now anything else is up to them.
 
I want a very good casket and a very short funeral. Maybe I should have one like this Mexican one I saw the other day. They were having a party up in there.
 
I already have my funeral arrangements in place, to include song, church, sermon etc. I told a friend of mine, if I die before her do not let them start eating until I pray over the food. Being a minister, I try to encourage the family to abide by the wishes of the deceased. Also, families have to be aware of crooked morticians. They, will rob you quicker than you can blink your eye. That's why it's good to have pre-arrangements.
 
Yeah you should try to take care of stuff early. You don't want family running around trying to find money or make arrangements.
 
You don't want family running around trying to find money or make arrangements.
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98

Several relatives own's funeral homes in Memphis and we run into this problem three to five times a year. I can not believe a man {head of the house} with a wife and children, working everyday, do not have anytype of insurance on his family.

We had one case, where the family said "we do not have any money to bury our father" We offered to bury him at cost. Two, weeks later we found out they had cash in a 50K insurance policy. Now we do not bury anyone, unless they have 1/2 the money up front or show proof of insurance.
 
I don't care for Funerals, I think they are a waste of money, money is for the living not the dead. My preference is Cremation.
 
Well come people do both. They have a funeral, but they have cremation in the place of burial not the funeral. I think I'll choose mummification.
 
Originally posted by Dr. Sweet NUPE
I was in a discussion with my girlfriend not too long ago and we were talking about funerals. I stated that I know what type of casket I want and that I want an extremely short funeral. I'm talking 30 minutes at the most. She stated that funerals are not for the deceased but for the living and I should let my love ones take care of it. I strongly disagree....what's your opinion?
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Being in Organizations can lengthen a Funeral. I, myself, am in too many organizations to want an hour funeral. Everybody has a ritual they need to do.

I dont know about Kappa, but Sigma has a funeral rutual they do.

So if you want a Kappa Ritual, that's time added to that 30 minutes.

Ok, Now for the question you posted:
I agree you should respect the wishes of the loved one but remember they are gone. They will not know if they have a hat on or not. neither will they care. But I :D would abide by the wishes they set.

:)
 
I think wishes of the deceased should be abided by if reasonable. I personally asked NOT to have a church funeral but instead cremate me and have a huge celebration on my front lawn and put my ashes (in the urn of course) in between the massive food and beer tables so I could see the action. And I also asked that whatever they did, make it so nobody could thump their cigarette ashes on me.

My mother and son were NOT amused.
:D
 

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I'm gonna arrange for a huge shrine to be built to me. I am gonna have my body on display it in like they do Lennin's body in Russia. I guess I'll find a way to stay preserved.
 
All I worry about is that there is money set aside to take care of the expenses. I would not want my family to be concerned about paying.
 
I think that the best thing is pre-planning including payment, at least have the plot and casket ready. After that, if someone had expressed what they wanted then it should be honored, if not just make the funeral respectable.
Tres Veces
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While we're on the "death" subject

If you have kids, you need to make sure you have a will in place. Also, as far as the funeral thing goes...I would suggest to state your wishes to your loved ones now. Hopefully, they'll respect your wishes and grant your request(s).
 
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