The Sopranos Last Episode
?I get it!!!!!! I GET IT!!!!!?
If you are familiar with the Sopranos, you recognize these words. These are the words that Tony Soprano screamed at the top of his lungs after his three day peyote trip to the Las Vegas desert after Christopher died?.really was killed by Tony. What he got, we will never know, just like a whole lot of things we will never get, because if you believe David Chase, the Executive Producer, and writer and director of the final Sopranos episode, the 5 seconds of black screen we all saw at the end of last night?s final episode is the end.
No more. Zip. Zero. Nada. No movie. No alternate endings on the DVD. This was the ending he wanted to do two years ago, when he first contemplated ending the series, but was talked into two?.and a half?. more seasons by the HBO brass for a ton of money. This is what we all waited with baited breath for. This is what we Sopranos fans scoured the internet for 10 weeks looking for; some hint as to what would happen to Tony and his ?family (s)?. All of the questions that normally come with the end of a great series?.and make no mistake?.this was a great series. In my opinion, this was the best television on television in the last 6 years. It had everything. You related to the characters. You laughed with them and at them. You mourned with them and for them. It made you sit up in your chair and exclaim ?Damn? when something unexpected or shocking happened. It also made you scream ?What the F@#k????? when something really unexpected happened.
There was a lot of ?What the f@#k????? screams last night at 9:03 CDT all over America. Whether or not this morning you attempt to justify the ending with various explanations such as ?it was real life? or ? this is what you expect from Chase? or I love the fact that he is setting us up for a movie in the future? ?.at 9:03 CDT you were sitting in front of your television, or someone else television screaming ?WHAT THE F@#K???? and grabbing your phone to call your cable company or your satellite dish company to find out what idiot pulled the plug on the best television series ever to be broadcast just at the moment we would all find out what would happen to Tony Soprano and his family.
But?it wasn?t your cable or satellite company who pulled the plug. It was David Chase. And I can imagine while he was tugging on the cord, he and his minions were laughing with glee at all the fools out there who thought that they would really get closure on what happened. I?m sure that wherever he is today (it seems that he was ?not available for comment? last night), after standing outside his palatial home listening to the screams and wails of Soprano sycophants who were left hanging, he felt a sense of accomplishment. A sense of triumph. A sense of relief. He had pulled it off.
He had played everybody.
There are people saying that it was a great ending, that it mirrored real life, that we can use our imagination to figure out what happened that we really don?t deserve to know. The cast members love the ending with Michael Imperioli (Christopher) stating that ?its vintage Chase, we all expected something like this.? If you did, you should have let us ?peons? know and not participate in the greatest hoax ever perpetrated on a television audience since?..since?.well since ever. I wanted closure. I needed closure. I did NOT want to use my imagination to figure out what happened. I wanted to KNOW. I wanted an ENDING. I was promised an ENDING. I did not get an ending. I got some bullsiht 5 seconds of black picture preceded by 5 minutes of the most suspenseful television I have ever witnessed.
I didn?t want ?real life?. If I had wanted real life I would have watched the Tony Awards on the other network. I did not want to use my imagination. That?s what I pay them for, that?s why I pay exorbitant fees for satellite and movie channels. I want an ending. There are too many situations in REAL LIFE that I do not know the answer to, or whats going to happen next or how someone is going to react in the next moment that I have to deal with daily than to have to use my imagination to figure out what is going to happen to Tony Soprano. That?s why I watch the show?TO FIND OUT WHATS GOING TO HAPPEN TO TONY SOPRANO. I do not like to be manipulated?and I felt @ss raped (thanks Kathy Griffin) last night by Chase and HBO.
So now I am pissed. I am pissed at David Chase?pissed at HBO?pissed at all the enablers out there who are telling me what a great ending that was to the best show on television. I am pissed at all these critics and reviewers who are patting Chase and HBO on the back talking about how ?innovative? and original this was.
BULLSIHT.
It was a copout?plain and simple. It was manipulation. It was a swindle?a fraud on every Soprano fan and viewer out there. We fell for it?.hook line and sinker. We played the game and got played by those who knew the game was rigged from the beginning and did not tell us?.and probably enjoyed watching us make damn fools of ourselves. They listened to us speculate, knowing they were about to @ss rape us (thanks Kathy Griffin) and continued to diddle us, making us hot to trot, all the time preparing the unlubricated dildo?laughing at us as they did so.
And?if in the future somebody comes up with an idea to make a Sopranos movie, I will be here to remind you sycophants that it was CHASE himself who said that there would be no movie, no update, that this was the ending HE wanted and he should leave it as it is?with all the money that would accompany a movie deal. He made his bed, let him lie in it.
So I hereby declare for everyone to see and know?..and I do not give a f@#k if you go along with me or not. ?.I refuse to watch one more minute of the Sopranos. Some of you may laugh and say ?its too late you idiot, the last episode was last night??.but all of you know that there will be syndication deals, reruns, specials featuring the cast and support people, and maybe even a movie?.The Sopranos, the Beginning?..or heaven forbid?.5 years from now, The Sopranos?A.J. and Meadow Take Over. Its coming?you know and I know it. And I will not watch it. Not one second. Being @ss raped (thanks Kathy Griffin) hurts like hell and I only want to experience that once.
So, that?s it. The end. Finished. Kaput. Over. But not for me?..it will never be over. Because I was cheated out of an ending. There was no ending, how could it ever be over?
WHAT THE F@#K??????
