Submissiveness


Bighead

Bighead

Well-Known Member
It all comes down to being submissive to make it 40 - 50 years of marriage.

I asked a chick, not dating her, just talking to her..convo sh1t...but I asked her if I was in the bed with you, at the time I came home, I wasn't hungry, but maybe a hour later while just laying in bed/resting, Would you fix me something to eat...and not even on some 1-2 hour meal preparation, just a turkey sammich or some sh1t...I said to her..you just chilling, watching T.V...laying in bed next to me..or playing candy crush, would fix me something to eat?

She said..n***a yo hands not broke, I aint fixing you sh1t, and why are you bothering me...when I'm in the middle of candy crush..LOL

Little do she know, I was like to myself, Welp, I wont be trying to pursue anything with yo ass..

Another chick I asked, what her thoughts were on being submissive to her man..she told me she didn't wanna talk about that. LOL

So as a black man, how can I value you, you, when you won't even talk about submissiveness

Was I out of line for saying, "That's why yall asses don't have a man now"? LOL

Help out a young breh..

Women chime in...
 

Alpha males do not ask for submission. Males and Females willingly submit to alphas. I always tell my guy friends to get what you want and stop trying to change people. If you want a doormat go get you one, there are a bunch that will submit blindly.

However, fixing a man something to eat shouldn't be a big deal if you really like the guy you are dealing with.
 
Bleedbluefan said:
Alpha males do not ask for submission. Males and Females willingly submit to alphas. I always tell my guy friends to get what you want and stop trying to change people. If you want a doormat go get you one, there are a bunch that will submit blindly.

However, fixing a man something to eat shouldn't be a big deal if you really like the guy you are dealing with.
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Why there should there be a change...being submissive should be taught from childhood eh???

Should this be a nature thing per say...
 
Bighead....I have been through it with women.

I asked my lady to marry me because she makes me BETTER. When I'm mad she can calm me with a touch. When I'm down I don't hesitate to talk to her to help motivate me.

As far as the questions you asked they are good questions because it's what YOU want. Yet, remember reciprocation is key. These people who believe a relationship or marriage is 50/50 are foolish. Some days it's 99/1. It takes work and dedication.

More relevant to your question I have never gotten my own plate in the presence of my lady NEVER. Moreover my lady since we have been together has never opened her own door, never taken out her trash, never changed a light bulb.
 
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Bighead said:
Why there should there be a change...being submissive should be taught from childhood eh???

Should this be a nature thing per say...
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No submissiveness should not be taught from childhood. Would you want your daughter to be automatically submissive to a man who beats her?

Respect should be taught from childhood. As my father said "you don't have to like everyone but you must respect everyone."
 
I don't know about the whole alpha thing; but make sure that she respects you. When women stop respecting you as a man it's a wrap.

Now I have heard that the oldest woman of the family normally is hard to carry on a relationship with because they are more than likely used to running things.
 
Tiger1 said:
I don't know about the whole alpha thing; but make sure that she respects you. When women stop respecting you as a man it's a wrap.

Now I have heard that the oldest woman of the family normally is hard to carry on a relationship with because they are more than likely used to running things.
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That is so true.

My dad asked me a while back do you want a woman who respects you first and love you second or loves you first and respects you second?

I want respect first.
 
The Founder said:
Bighead....I have been through it with women.

I asked my lady to marry me because she makes me BETTER. When I'm mad she can calm me with a touch. When I'm down I don't hesitate to talk to her to help motivate me.

As far as the questions you asked they are good questions because it's what YOU want. Yet, remember reciprocation is key. These people who believe a relationship or marriage is 50/50 are foolish. Some days it's 99/1. It takes work and dedication.

More relevant to your question I have never gotten my own plate in the presence of my lady NEVER. Moreover my lady since we have been together has never opened her own door, never taken out her trash, never changed a light bulb.
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Drop a gem Founder guy..

Never thought about that one breh...

Gems breh..the last part was a gem...

So not to get in your biz...did you ask your lady to get your plate or was it something she did on her own..and when she did it..what went through your mind?
 
Tiger1 said:
I don't know about the whole alpha thing; but make sure that she respects you. When women stop respecting you as a man it's a wrap.

Now I have heard that the oldest woman of the family normally is hard to carry on a relationship with because they are more than likely used to running things.
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IF your woman leaves the house and doesn't tell you, just leave and hops in the car and drives off...

Would you consider her not respecting you? and to flip it or even look into the same lens..going through your woman phone is that disrespecting your woman.

Not to get away from the topic or anything, but the respect thing brought about that question
 

Bighead said:
Drop a gem Founder guy..

Never thought about that one breh...

Gems breh..the last part was a gem...

So not to get in your biz...did you ask your lady to get your plate or was it something she did on her own..and when she did it..what went through your mind?
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My lady is a country girl. Country to heart fucking heart. She has class and hearing her voice you would swear she is not from the small rural town in Louisiana with a population of about 2500. So from her upbringing she was shown and taught that men plan and women manage. I was not surprised nor stunned because that's what my mother did for my dad. She got his plate. So when my lady got mine hell I was like this is normal.
 
From a woman's perspective: The majority of people who scream submissive do not actually understand it. For many, it means, as a man, I am your God. Uh uh...marriage IS work and it's give and take, back and forth so that at the end of the day, everything equals out. And they are correct RESPECT carries more weight than gold. See, when you RESPECT your partner, you will pause before you do stuff that makes, them, you look bad and which you know will cause them to see you differently.

IMO, if men learned NEVER TO SAY SUBMISSIVE...just be the best guy you can to her...I swear, things will work out. Women LOVE their men in most cases. They want to do for them...but then you get the guy that's talking with his friends/fam on how they think things "should" be done that may be completely opposite what your partner likes, next thing you know, he comes here acting like a Flintstone...you just developing resistance and resentment which WILL show up. If you've made it to marriage, unless it's arranged, folks already know what each other likes, how they want to be treatment, etc. This showing out in front of your folks, demanding stuff, now that gets everybody's feeling hurt and creates divides you don't have to have.

In marriage, you got to check you ego and pride. Don't let your mouth overload the situation from a testosterone surge. It ALL about compromising and bringing your 100% ALL OR NOTHING self to the table. And if you guys don't learn nothing else, know this: WOMEN REMEMBER DISRESPECT for a LONG time afterwards......
 
Dreams. Lol The real key which no one tells you is there is no such thing as 50/50. What I mean by that is sometimes you gotta lose and sometimes she has to win. If you don't understand that don't waste your time. See it's easy loving someone when things are good, but can you love them when things are down? The real key to a loving relationship and lasting relationship is getting someone you like to spend the rest of your life with. Not someone you love. I can learn to love you, but If I dislike your ways in 2016 I will dislike them in 2036. Love comes and goes, but liking someone last for ever. Many people divorce, break up, separate or what ever you call it that still love each other. They just never liked each other ways.......
 
Bighead said:
IF your woman leaves the house and doesn't tell you, just leave and hops in the car and drives off...

Would you consider her not respecting you? and to flip it or even look into the same lens..going through your woman phone is that disrespecting your woman.

Not to get away from the topic or anything, but the respect thing brought about that question
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Scenario 1 is disrespect

Scenario 2 is distrust which will eventually lead to disrespect.

Marriage will be one of the hardest things you will do in life. Know who and what you are getting into.

My motto after a divorce is "Blessed singleness beats double cursedness any day. "
 
CEE DOG said:
Having a weak submissive woman must be a country boy thing? Weak people pass on weak genes. I need strong woman not some passive complaining chick who needs attention.
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Actually Cee, it takes more strength to submit than you may think. Submission and weakness are not necessarily synonymous.
 
Herbert77060 said:
Actually Cee, it takes more strength to submit than you may think. Submission and weakness are not necessarily synonymous.
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I agree, but most folks don't understand true submissiveness really is. Many see it as a way to control not understanding that it comes from true friendship. Marriage is more important when the two have a real friendship then sexing and love. When your prick doesn't get hard like it once did and her cat needs ky, if you have never had a true friendship well the white man will split the belongings in Court or someone will die off first. Lol
 
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CEE DOG said:
I agree, but most folks don't understand true submissiveness really is. Many see it as a way to control not understanding that it comes from true friendship. Marriage is more important when the two have a real friendship then sexing and love. When your prick doesn't get hard like it once did and her cat needs it if you have never had a true friendship well the white man will split the belongings in Court or someone will die off first. Lol
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True

The penis and vagina will get old and familiar real quick.

Make sure that chick will have your back and wont DO you when things get rough.
 
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