Fortitude
Sybarite
The Pastor is asking that everyone who just HAS TO LAUGH when Ms. Hattie is singing, could you please throw at least one amen in there cause yall hurting her feelings.
Our new piano player, Jerome, hails from Lulu's House of Beauty and Entertainment. We will be ordering his new rainbow colored piano bench out of money given to the building fund.
If you ain't been to church in 6 months, you are considered a visitor. So when the time comes, please stand. Some people don't like when we start singing, "It's Some Visitors In This House, When You See 'Em Point 'Em Out!!!" Save yourself the embarrassment.
We are having a Bake Sale next Saturday. If you see your name, don't bother to bring anything. The church does not have "diarrhea" insurance and is tired of being sued.
It has beenbrought to Pastor's attention that some of the members thinks it's okay to take off their shoes in church. Stankin feet makes it impossible to concentrate on the Word.
We will be taking up a collection for the annual Pastor's Gold Teeth Fund. He will be having them polished and will be adding two more. Say Hallelujah.
The deadline for entering the Big Hat contest has passed so ladies and Jerome, please stop wearing your big hats. The people behind you can't see. O-KAY!!! This was my situation yesterday!!!
Anyone caught eating in the church will be asked to leave if they didn't bring enough for the pastor & HIS WIFE. Yall know she gets jealous if you don't bring her somthing too.
Ushers: We don't mind you doing the prep when you're marching in front of the choir, but we do ask that you take out the "hand in your face" step. A few ladies have been complaining about their wigs being knocked off.
The Church's annual anniversary dinner........ We are serving punch, fried chicken, greens and cornbread. The price is, $50.00 per plate and we do not accept checks or credit cards but they will be accepting food stamps. Don't forget to come early, you know they always running out of chicken.
Our new piano player, Jerome, hails from Lulu's House of Beauty and Entertainment. We will be ordering his new rainbow colored piano bench out of money given to the building fund.
If you ain't been to church in 6 months, you are considered a visitor. So when the time comes, please stand. Some people don't like when we start singing, "It's Some Visitors In This House, When You See 'Em Point 'Em Out!!!" Save yourself the embarrassment.
We are having a Bake Sale next Saturday. If you see your name, don't bother to bring anything. The church does not have "diarrhea" insurance and is tired of being sued.
It has beenbrought to Pastor's attention that some of the members thinks it's okay to take off their shoes in church. Stankin feet makes it impossible to concentrate on the Word.
We will be taking up a collection for the annual Pastor's Gold Teeth Fund. He will be having them polished and will be adding two more. Say Hallelujah.
The deadline for entering the Big Hat contest has passed so ladies and Jerome, please stop wearing your big hats. The people behind you can't see. O-KAY!!! This was my situation yesterday!!!
Anyone caught eating in the church will be asked to leave if they didn't bring enough for the pastor & HIS WIFE. Yall know she gets jealous if you don't bring her somthing too.
Ushers: We don't mind you doing the prep when you're marching in front of the choir, but we do ask that you take out the "hand in your face" step. A few ladies have been complaining about their wigs being knocked off.
The Church's annual anniversary dinner........ We are serving punch, fried chicken, greens and cornbread. The price is, $50.00 per plate and we do not accept checks or credit cards but they will be accepting food stamps. Don't forget to come early, you know they always running out of chicken.