Why Men Don't Marry?


In_The_662 said:
I saw a video recently about why getting a marriage license is an invitation to the state getting all in your business. As some have said, you lose up to half of everything plus other things that are definitely not in the favor of the man.

The suggestion was to get a marriage contract drawn up. If a person doesn't live up to their end in the marriage, they lose _____ (whatever is agreed upon). At the rate this country is going, I can see that becoming a thing

I wanted kids even as few as 5 years ago. Now I just wanna work and sleep and get some tang without the constraints of a marriage lol. And as my frat suggested, we are getting close to the age where the women our age will have grown kids or kids close to heading to college so it's best to get with those type of women. He's right although more women my age (30-40) are not having kids or waiting until they are where they wanna be in their career (one of my good friends from Valley falls in that boat) so it's possible that I could land a childless woman but I'm probably have to leave Mississippi to do that
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If you're a man over the age of 30.. trying to have kids by a woman thats 30-40 age range is kind of shaky... just say 25-36..a woman older than 36 aint trying to have kids imo

The comedian Donnell Rawlings was 43 and had his 1st kid by a 23 yr old woman cause he said he didn't want to be a stepdad especially with a grown stepson to take care of lol...Charlemagne,Yee, & Envy asked him on their show about the age gap and he said he didn't care cause majority women in their late 30s not having kids....Imo a 20 yr gap is too much but 12-15 is ok'd in black society today cause of celebs like jay z and beyonce etc...jay z almost 50 still having kids lol

if the woman was 25 & over they wouldnt have asked him imo cause for some reason any attractive black woman over the age of 25 will say "I'm old" & the consensus by others is that she is a "grown ass woman" that can get knocked up by a man in his 40s
 
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JayRob said:
I see that Jesus Christ fella is a real playa playa with the single AND married women.
Wonder how he gets so many women to save themselves for him.
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I believe in Christ, but I will never understand why so many people let the church make their lives boring. By boring I mean they don't experience life to the fullest. I truly don't think God didn't want us to experience life and have a wonderful enjoying life. I hope that makes sense. Lol
 

96lioness said:
I cannot stress enough the importance of knowing the Holy Bible for one's own self:

The husband must fulfill his [marital] duty to his wife [with good will and kindness], and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does NOT have [exclusive] authority over her own body, but the husband shares with her; and likewise the husband does NOT have [exclusive] authority over his body, but the wife shares with him. Do NOT deprive each other [of marital rights], except perhaps by mutual consent for a time, so that you may devote yourselves [unhindered] to prayer, but come together again so that Satan will not tempt you [to sin] because of your lack of self-control!- 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 (AMP)

Any church that stands open in the name of Jesus Christ and stands on the word of God has NO business preaching/teaching celibacy among married couples.
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96lioness said:
One last thing:

God ordained marriage. I personally believe that marriage is the second greatest gift God gave to us; I believe that marriage is a holy union between a man and a woman that God Himself established even before their conception. Any marriage between a man and woman that is bound by God will be bound forever by Him. That's one of the keys to a successful marriage. Also knowing the specific roles in a marriage based on God's standards are imperative. The husband has his role, the wife has hers, and they work together to be a strong union built upon God's foundation of happiness and longevity. The problem is too many people don't use His standards, or they don't seek His counsel to fully know and understand His standards, which is why so many people treat marriage like it's nothing and divorce so easily.
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Lioness I call any church that separates men from women etc....a cult.

Concerning the red part.....this is how my wife and I function. I have learned that it is the husband's job to sacrifice the most. It's just certain things my wife is not going to do. PERIOD. It's certain things I'm not going to do. PERIOD. My wife and I did not go through the spiritual counseling before marriage. To me that is something instituted by a pastor to exercise his/her power with the couple. In my opinion marriage is quite easy. What makes it hard is when couples start paying attention to stupid stuff. I was 42 and my wife 35 when we got married. The maturity helped us alot.

We give each other space. For example she will never post here. I don't have a facebook account. I have an instagram she doesn't. We watch TOTALLY different television shows as well. I go to the gym after work to relax. She comes home and doesn't like to talk. The hour after work gives our down time.

Like I said we have simplified marriage. Another example, we are building a custom home. I asked her what she wanted and she said a large kitchen and large closet. So I designed the home and I show her different kitchen and bathroom with closets layouts. She's not concerned about anything else.

In short like I said earlier we simplified it. One of the good things is when I became a Deacon she became a Deaconess. Those older people are really teaching us a lot as a couple.[/QUOTE]
 
TRU3000 said:
If you're a man over the age of 30.. trying to have kids by a woman thats 30-40 age range is kind of shaky... just say 25-36..a woman older than 36 aint trying to have kids imo

The comedian Donnell Rawlings was 43 and had his 1st kid by a 23 yr old woman cause he said he didn't want to be a stepdad especially with a grown stepson to take care of lol...Charlemagne,Yee, & Envy asked him on their show about the age gap and he said he didn't care cause majority women in their late 30s not having kids....Imo a 20 yr gap is too much but 12-15 is ok'd in black society today cause of celebs like jay z and beyonce etc...jay z almost 50 still having kids lol

if the woman was 25 & over they wouldnt have asked him imo cause for some reason any attractive black woman over the age of 25 will say "I'm old" & the consensus by others is that she is a "grown ass woman" that can get knocked up by a man in his 40s
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My story is a bit different. I have known my step son longer than my biological son. I didn't know I had a son until he was 14 at that time my step son was 9. At that time my wife and I had been dating a year. We are in final stages of me legally adopting my step son who is not 15. When I say my step son has my heart...that big head sucker has my heart. My oldest; well he keeps feeding in to what his mother's family says about me and attempts to utilize me as an ATM. He is now 19 and truly confused. Advice goes in one ear and out of the other. He is having to find his way. The 15 year old...he trying to learn everything I dish out.
 
CEE DOG said:
I believe in Christ, but I will never understand why so many people let the church make their lives boring. By boring I mean they don't experience life to the fullest. I truly don't think God didn't want us to experience life and have a wonderful enjoying life. I hope that makes sense. Lol
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Yea I feel you. I know people who don't go to movies because they feel like it's not Godly but they will watch the real housewives and other realty TV crap.
 
CEE DOG said:
I believe in Christ, but I will never understand why so many people let the church make their lives boring. By boring I mean they don't experience life to the fullest. I truly don't think God didn't want us to experience life and have a wonderful enjoying life. I hope that makes sense. Lol
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CeeDog don't let me get started on those undercover "church freaks" who sleeping with other women's husbands in the church and other churches. The men are just as wrong as the women.

Funny story....I'm at vacation Bible School and this young girl was there. So we started talking and we got on the subject of dating and how it is hard for women to find a man. Well I pointed to this young guy from our church who just graduated college, has a job teaching, and is a good guy. She said she didn't like him because he lives with his mother. She then said she liked this other guy and I saw the wedding band and I told her he was married. She said "So...that means he is not asking for longevity."

I was truly stunned for about 10 minutes. Everything she was saying after that sounded like that teacher on Charlie Brown. After I snapped back I told her that her thinking was flawed which is why she is still single and she needs to focus on her worth as a woman. I called over my wife and asked my wife to talk to her. That was my last conversation with her because quite frankly I don't trust being around her. So I distance myself.
 
buckwheat1911 said:
I think that is my problem. I just need a hobby. I'm usually busy taking the kids here and there, doing things with and for the wife and not myself.
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Man, that's the story of my life right now. But lately I've been making an effort to do little stuff here and there. Go to a sports bar and have a couple beers. Check out a movie during the day that I know my wife has no interest in seeing. Little stuff like that helps me recharge and keeps me from losing myself. I'd hate to get to a boiling point, and go into rebellion mode.
 
LS Syndicate said:
Man, that's the story of my life right now. But lately I've been making an effort to do little stuff here and there. Go to a sports bar and have a couple beers. Check out a movie during the day that I know my wife has no interest in seeing. Little stuff like that helps me recharge and keeps me from losing myself. I'd hate to get to a boiling point, and go into rebellion mode.
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Yea man you have to do some things for yourself. I can't wait until my house is finished because I would get in to varnishing furniture. Sanding it down and stuff.
 
jsupop33 said:
I get up at 4 am every morning and head to gym by 5am. That morning gym session keeps me sane.
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Team I have got t find something for myself. On the weekends, I get up early and ride my bike several miles to have some sort of me time. I have a gym membership at work, but I just don’t have enough time to go work out.
 

buckwheat1911 said:
Team I have got t find something for myself. On the weekends, I get up early and ride my bike several miles to have some sort of me time. I have a gym membership at work, but I just don’t have enough time to go work out.
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You need to take that hour for you. If anything just for your health. I have noticed that by working out I'm more patient and relaxed. When my wife has her mood swings instead of me trying to figure out what's wrong I'm like ok. She will be alright. LOL

jsupop33 said:
Yeah man. You will go crazy without it.
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I was going crazy. When I lived in DC I worked out 4 to 7 days a week. I'm at 4 now and in a month will get up to 5 and then 6.

I enjoy being married because I married the right person for me. What I mean is God sent me a gift and I treat it as such. I think when God had that scripture written, "Love your wife like God loves the church," I feel that God knew that marriage will be more of a struggle for men than it will be for women. Women can deal with more than a man. If you don't believe it look at how many women stand by a man who has outside kids. How many men would stand by a woman who got pregnant by another dude.
 
Being real, I have absolutely no desire to get married. There are some perks to it I know but it's just never really been something I desired to do. Pretty sure most men wouldn't get married if it wasn't something that was expected of them to do either. I'm in my mid 30's. Pretty much everyone that I went to high school with for the most part all got married in their early to mid 20's. The majority of them are either divorced and dating, divorced and remarried, divorced and single with kids, divorced and paying child support.... or still together for the sake of the kids or finances. And then of course those females that stay because they've had kids by the dude and are now in their mid to late 30's and feel like it's too late to start over and are miserable. And then also of course the dudes that stay because "it's cheaper to keep her."

Yea, I know there are plenty of "successful" marriages out there, but if we're going to be real, they are far outnumbered by those that I spoke of above. Honestly it's kinda funny... on facebook i'm friends with a ton of people that I went to high school with and you'd be amazed at how many times dudes that are considered to be single (in other words, not married), get private messages from these married women. "Hey, what you been up to I haven't seen you in so long...", "Hey, I saw your momma the other day and been thinking about you ever since...", "Hey i'm going to be in your area Saturday night, what you have going on..." Man you just have no idea. And pretty much no dude wants to believe his woman would do it but, there are SO many that are. If you have one of those wives that always looks forward to "girls night" with major excitement...well, there's a good chance i'm talking to you lol.
 
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unknown1 said:
If you have one of those wives that always looks forward to "girls night" with major excitement...well, there's a good chance i'm talking to you lol.
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This goes both ways for men and women.... I usually hang out during football season and that depends on which ones of my homies come home. Usually me and MackG ends up at "The Voice of GSU's" house watching other football games (if GSU had a day game) and chillin. My wife and her cousins usually go to concerts in Shreveport together other than that we both are usually out together.

I think the biggest problem is brothers forget about chasing their wives and sisters forget how to entice their man to chase them. As I told my wife on yesterday, a woman should try her hardest to remain sexy and keep herself up and a man should have to constantly show his wife he yearns for her.
 
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